[-] Apytele@sh.itjust.works 19 points 5 hours ago

we had some trouble one morning when I was too tired to drive trying to get the dog to the vet. we kept ordering pet Ubers and the drivers kept showing up and canceling when they saw we had the dog. they kept saying they just saw the better rate and didn't realize it was because we had a dog with us. except it took like 10 minutes each time we had to try and get a new driver and we were trying to make it to the appointment on time at risk of them canceling the appointment and charging us a fee. is Uber going to reimburse me for the missed appointment fee? it didn't come to that in the end but it was very stressful.

[-] Apytele@sh.itjust.works 0 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago)

I get a lot of compliments on my use of the English language and I absolutely cannot stand prescriptivists (among other pedants).

[-] Apytele@sh.itjust.works 13 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Family bathrooms are also great. Once flew with my intellectually disabled sister who fucking fingerpainted a rest stop stall on a previous trip when my mother broke her arm chasing her to the bathroom and she was left to her own devices. This time I brought gloves and wet wipes and there was a little suite kinda thing. I didn't need the child size toilet or the breastfeeding couch but the nice big accessible area around the adult toilet was good to have. She wasn't constipated that time so I didn't have to stop her from digging it out manually again but man; if I'd had to I totally could've! 10/10 would use a family bathroom again.

[-] Apytele@sh.itjust.works 11 points 3 days ago

Oh for a lot of immigrants I do wind up resorting to folk music, and there's a lot of overlap with hymns and other spiritual music.

[-] Apytele@sh.itjust.works 85 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

Oh that's actually a known phenomenon music is a different part of the brain from speech for some reason. Lemme get on the computer with a keyboard I've got a few more fun comments...

  • Here's a ballerina getting activated like a fucking sleeper agent to the score from Swan Lake. I'd also like to comment that the way she's in the wheelchair and kinda slumped over to me suggests that the dementia has likely progressed enough that she's having trouble walking (it even affects muscle memory, eventually she may even forget how to swallow) so the fact that music can activate her muscle memory anyway is pretty cool.

  • If you ever have a relative with dementia that requires caregivers that are not family or friends (nurses, home health aides, etc) please put together two music playlists for me (or spiritual me 😉):

    • one set of chill music I can play if I need them to relax for bedtime and stressful events
    • one more upbeat set of songs physical or recreation therapy can play if they need to get them up and out of bed.

If I don't know what songs they like I'll usually try whatever was popular in their demographic when they were 15-25y/o but that's never gonna beat knowing the exact song they danced to at their wedding.

Thnx for reading! <3

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cross-posted from: https://sh.itjust.works/post/36489019

INZOI: ...the maze is complete.

More conceptual than anything else, I rarely actually play these games I mostly just make houses and people and never actually play...

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submitted 4 weeks ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago) by Apytele@sh.itjust.works to c/games@lemmy.world

Design constraints:

  • The solution path is from the outside opening to the large courtyard in the middle (or the reverse depending on how you look at it)
  • no walls meet at a checkerboard / catty corner angle. All corners are solid L-shapes
  • no 4x4 empty spaces outside of the entrance and nine courtyards
  • no loops where you can return to a point without retracing your original path
  • all small courtyards have an entrance and exit and are part of the solve path to the center
  • all large courtyards (I'm going to put side goals / easter eggs in them) have only one entrance and are reachable as a branch of the solution path after the small courtyard that they are clockwise from.

If you're curious, the center is a witch / wizard tower covered and filled with plants with a ground floor that's an open arboretum kinda thing with stairs leading upward and a 2-level loft kinda thing up top with the bed / bath etc. When I used to play the sims the occupant would be a completely leveled up witch / wizard. Even if they don't officially add a magic mechanic in Inzoi I'm sure there will be a community mod at some point...

Blueprint / Solution:

spoiler


EDIT: Removed / rearranged accidental Swastika just to the right of the lower-left large courtyard. original below.

spoiler


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A classic (sh.itjust.works)
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submitted 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) by Apytele@sh.itjust.works to c/mentalhealth@lemmy.world

Short Version - it's a list of things to do instead of ~~doing dumb shit~~ making life altering-ly bad decisions.

I typed this up real quick in reply to a question I saw elsewhere on Lemmy.

Why?

  1. Your mental health just generally sucks lately
  2. You're waiting on an appointment with a psychiatrist, psychologist, therapist, or other treatment program that is days, weeks, or even months away and you need to make it there in one piece.
  3. If you get dragged to the ER for ~~doing dumb shit~~ making bad / harmful decisions, you want something to show the ER psychiatrist so they're less likely to admit you to the psych ward (I work in one. I try, and if you need it you need it, but they pretty much all suck).
  4. You wanna start a trend among your friend / social group of thinking about these things ahead of time instead of right before or during the ~~dumb shit~~ life altering-ly bad decisions.

Also a cool upside: you can make this all on your own and never have to show anyone. You can print it off and write on it and stuff it under your pillow, you can take a picture of it and burn it, you could just write the entire thing out in a password-protected note. This is for you, and while it can help to share the plan with your loved ones, you don't actually have to show it to anyone!

Here's the SAMHSA template but if you don't like it there's plenty of different variations around on the internet or you can just make your own.

Components:

  1. Warning Signs: especially the less obvious ones you might not think about consciously, sleeping too much or too little, eating too much or too little, forgetting to shower, etc.
  2. Things you can do on your own: can be self-care activities like watching a favorite movie or having an at-home "spa day," or making sure to handle a responsibility that might make things worse if you miss it like making a doctors appointment if you already have one or checking on your finances.
  3. People or places to go for safety: This could be a family or friend's house, or if you don't have a safe home environment it could be something like the nearby waffle house. It can be helpful to pick somewhere where there's people to check on you, but it could also be a place of solitude like a hiking trail. Just try to consider what is actually safest for you, if you have a tendency to get into trouble when you isolate, plan to avoid that.
  4. People you can call: usually a friend or family member but it could also be a mentor or life coach or a trusted spiritual leader. I would put the person most likely to answer the phone for you at 3am near the top, then the next most likely et cetera.
  5. Crisis resources: these are the emergency "noting else worked" resources. A lot of places have local options, and there are a lot of specialized hotlines for minority and under-served populations such as LGBT, PoC, and veterans. If you can't find any local ones or don't like / trust the ones you find, Here's Wikipedia's List

If you found this helpful and are interested in a similar but more in-depth concept (and especially if you have a longer / more complicated mental health history), I highly recommend WRAP Planning. Again it's a plan you make for yourself and that you don't even need to share with anyone else if you don't want to:

  • SAMHSA Guide
  • Fill-In Workbook Again, there's multiple versions floating around the internet, and you don't even have to use all of it. Mine is four typed pages (two when printed front & back).
  • When you're filling out the list of things to do to stay well it can help to look at SAMHSAs guide to free support groups There's often better, more local options, I just give this one to patients as a cheat sheet to fill in some easy stuff

Hope this helps!

I was briefly working on a super basic website / guide to mental health concepts for people who can't afford / access therapy if anybody wants to collab (my biggest issue was lowering the reading level enough, it can be hard for me to remember which concepts will be new to someone who hasn't been working in the field for years).

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submitted 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) by Apytele@sh.itjust.works to c/witchymemes@lemmy.world

cross-posted from: https://sh.itjust.works/post/35248221

Text Extracted from the image:

  1. Erotic spell to attract a woman (Yale 1791 [second text]) STEPHEN EMMEL 158
  2. Another erotic spell to attract a woman (Berlin 8314) MARVIN MEYER 159
  3. Another erotic spell to attract a woman (Berlin 8325) MARVIN MEYER 160
  4. Another erotic spell to attract a woman (Heidelberg Kopt. 518) DAVID FRANKFURTER 161
  5. Another erotic spell to attract a woman (London Hay 10376) DAVID FRANKFURTER 164
  6. Spells for sex and business (London Hay 10414) DAVID FRANKFURTER 166
  7. Spell for a man to obtain a male lover (Ashmolean Museum 1981.940) DAVID FRANKFURTER 177

85 - 87. Three sexual curses to leave a man impotent and protect a woman from sexual advances (Chicago Oriental Institute 13767; Heidelberg Kopt. 682; Strasbourg Coptic Manuscript 135) MARVIN MEYER 178

CHAPTER 7 Curses

These are from an archeology textbook about ancient Christian Ritual Magic. I skipped some because these are my favorites so far. Also I can't get over the transition from the spells for horny men to the spells about women trying to get rid of the horny men (although I'm a little miffed that they stuffed them all into one chapter when the horny men each got their own individual ones). Honestly though most of the positive things I gain from reading ancient spiritual texts is just the reassurance that humanity hasn't fundamentally changed. My mother always acted like older times were simpler and purer. No, no they were not.

Bonus Mixed Amazon Reviews:

tim zidik - One Star Reviewed in the United States on August 26, 2014 - Verified Purchase weak not effective

gresmy - a true magical book Reviewed in Canada on November 27, 2013 - Verified Purchase wonderfull, educational. I personnaly like the ritual with psentebeth. It worked for me and the several different names of Isis just wow

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submitted 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) by Apytele@sh.itjust.works to c/showerthoughts@lemmy.world

Can I just pay someone with real event planning and social skills to just include me in whatever they're doing? It would be way better for my mental health than therapy.

Edit: not even just for me personally either. Like as a community thing. I pay my portion and the person planning all this uses it to rent a space and pay for catering or whatever and keeps a list of all of us and tries to get us all out of the house.

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submitted 2 months ago by Apytele@sh.itjust.works to c/books@lemmy.ml

I didn't know where else to share this but it's what I think every time someone says something like "ok 'Breq' from 'Gerentate.'"

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..... (www.duckduckgo.com)
submitted 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) by Apytele@sh.itjust.works to c/mildlyinfuriating@lemmy.world
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submitted 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) by Apytele@sh.itjust.works to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

I still have my ex's bathrobe that he grew out of, and that was two exes and over 10 years ago. It's a lightweight flannel that already had a slightly worn texture when he gave it to me but that literally has not changed in the decade since. It's not that "plush" stuff that gets weird and chunky within a few months, and it's not that super thin knit that gets holes within a few years. It doesn't have any of those whisps of thread that people like because they're soft but that get caught on calluses and hangnails and drive me insane. It's a horrible shade of dark green / navy plaid when I normally go for a more boho / mystical look but I would 100% perform magic spells in it anyway because it is that fucking comfortable. I've considered getting it embroidered just for some extra rizz but I worry it would get scratchy. 10/10 would steal from my ex again.

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submitted 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) by Apytele@sh.itjust.works to c/whatisthisthing@lemmy.world

Current out-of-bounds item list for reference:

  • Fidget and other sensory toys because I feel like moving in a certain way purely for the sake of itself isn't in the spirit of these challenges.
  • Alternative "wellness" products that largely function as placebos by being in the general vicinity of a person such as crystals and "energy focusing copper coils" and the like. Weird looking traditional instruments like a special type of gong or something are acceptable.
  • Specialty massage products are fine provided they're mostly used to massage an area other than the genitals (at least, assuming I can tell, but I'm fairly knowledgeable in that area). I do not use sex toys at all for these challenges (that's just not what my aim here is). It's also still ok if the specific massage philosophy claims to have other, pseudo-scientific benefits such as for chiropracty or acupuncture, as long as the tool itself is an actual massage tool.
  • objects that are mostly or entirely ornamental / decorative in nature like jewelry and sculptures. I'll still use something that is an ornamental version of something that has a specific non-ornamental purpose (ex: a lot of traditional fibercraft tools or recreational drug equipment for weed or caffeine). Hair ornaments and pins are fine as long as they have some specific niche use such as ornamental hair rollers or having an interesting closure for pinning your shawl in a specific way or something.
  • tools that are too broadly applicable such as specialty abrasive drill bits or specialty brushes where what makes them use specific is stuff like size shape and bristle stiffness which are still pretty broadly applicable (a little brush with a long handle has a looot of different uses, think about everything you can do with a used toothbrush).
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  • Fidget and other sensory toys because I feel like moving in a certain way purely for the sake of itself isn't in the spirit of these challenges.
  • Alternative "wellness" products that largely function as placebos by being in the general vicinity of a person such as crystals and "energy focusing copper coils" and the like. Weird looking traditional instruments like a special type of gong or something are acceptable.
  • Specialty massage products are fine provided they're mostly used to massage an area other than the genitals (at least, assuming I can tell, but I'm fairly knowledgeable in that area). I do not use sex toys at all for these challenges (that's just not what my aim here is). It's also still ok if the specific massage philosophy claims to have other, pseudo-scientific benefits such as for chiropracty or acupuncture, as long as the tool itself is an actual massage tool.
  • objects that are mostly or entirely ornamental / decorative in nature like jewelry and sculptures. I'll still use something that is an ornamental version of something that has a specific non-ornamental purpose (ex: a lot of traditional fibercraft tools or recreational drug equipment for weed or caffeine). Hair ornaments and pins are fine as long as they have some specific niche use such as ornamental hair rollers or having an interesting closure for pinning your shawl in a specific way or something.
  • tools that are too broadly applicable such as specialty abrasive drill bits or specialty brushes where what makes them use specific is stuff like size shape and bristle stiffness which are still pretty broadly applicable (a little brush with a long handle has a looot of different uses, think about everything you can do with a used toothbrush).
[-] Apytele@sh.itjust.works 423 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

If you're as disabled as you say and either you have documentation (such as state benefits) or it's just obvious I would try APS (adult protective services) over the cops. Things will move faster and more effectively if you do some of the legwork (hypothetically speaking) for them ahead of time.

  1. Get in touch with the family that might take you in. Try to find three options who confirm they will take you. Write down or keep in a Google doc or whatever their: full names, phone numbers, email addresses, and physical addresses. The number one thing I see holding up cases like yours is housing, and if you have all those details worked out ahead of time a caseworker can do a lot more for you a lot faster. A lot of the time our psych social workers can get someone a uber / lyft or bus ticket easily enough, the problem is figuring out where they're going. If you have the contact info of someone they can call right there and then who has already agreed to take you, you are a slam dunk open and shut case. Get three so you have backups.

  2. Arrange for a ride locally such as a friend or acquaintance or literally anyone else who has a car and is willing to help you for 24-48 hours. This should not be hard to talk someone into. Many people want to help a person like you but don't have the resources to house someone for weeks or months. For this acquantaince you are an easy way to help and feel good about themselves. Use that. Tell them to wait for you to contact them. Again, try to get three options set up so you have two failsafes.

  3. AFTER you've done that, call your local APS (adult protective services) or file a report online. Do whatever you can to keep your family from knowing you called because it might take a few hours up to maybe even a day or two for them to get to you and you don't want your family tipped off in the meantime. Tell them you're being held by your family and kept from accessing your legal identifying documents like your birth certificate. If you get state benefits your documentation or papers regularly mailed to you may also have a compliance / abuse reporting hotline number somewhere on it. You could also try a crisis hotline through an organization that does community outreach. Tell them they have abused you in the past and you are in fear for your life. Tell them you HAVE A PLACE TO GO you just need help getting your documents. Again, you are easy to help in this situation, they don't need to worry about setting you up with benefits or housing or anything, just transport maybe. This is what the numbers and addresses are for, they may want to confirm you have somewhere to go and even have options. Just play up the danger and that they're keeping you from your documents. If you get an asshole worker wait six hours and try again (change of shift) or try calling a different agency or the next town over. You may also be able to find other places to call or worst case scenario call 911.

  4. The SECOND they show up and if they're able to get you those documents, get the hell out to that person who's helping you locally and block your family and do not tell or hint or give them any other indication of where you're going. Don't even tell the person giving you a ride if you think it will get back to them. If necessary tell them an entirely different final destination and just get them to get you to the airport / bus terminal and get out.

  5. while you're waiting, get all your medications, medical equipment / supplies, any valuables or sentimental items, and 3-5 changes of clothes all in the same area of the house. Make sure to pack sentimental clothing but especially pack accessible clothing that's easy for you to dress yourself with. Get them into a bag if you think you can do so discreetly, but a box or even just a pile in an out of the way corner is fine. If you have any special skin safe shampoo or other non-medicine but important toiletries stash them too or just make sure they're all in the same place in the bathroom. Get everything into 1-3 discreet / hidden piles so you just need to throw them in a trash bag and go. If there's any valuables you think your family will try to dispute ownership of, try to get any receipts or photos of you wearing or using them or texts from someone who bought them for you or whatever else you can find and put them in a Google drive folder or email to yourself. Worst case scenario though, be willing to leave some things behind if you have to.

Good luck and godspeed. :)

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Apytele

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