"The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb." Meaning contracts, friendships, and keeping promises should take priority over family loyalty.

Now changed to "Blood is thicker than water" and means the exact opposite of the original.

Yes, many people including myself feel exactly as you have described here. I started seeing a therapist about 2 months ago and it's been helping me. I'm not going to tell you what to do, but I am going to say that experience has taught me that it won't go away on its own. I would strongly encourage you to seek professional help. The sooner the better. Don't wait 10 years like I did.

Things the Pope and David Miscavige have in common for 1000.

I've heard the best way to tell the difference is to check your pants. If you crapped your pants it's probably a grizzly.