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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/ClaireBear_mama on 2023-09-19 18:49:34.
I (F, 33) had three children when I met my current boyfriend (M, 35) - an 11-year-old boy, a 9-year-old boy, and a 7-year-old girl. He did not have any children of his own. Within a few weeks of dating, I became pregnant again. My boyfriend, Daniel, was incredibly excited about becoming a father. Now, we have four children, including our one-year-old baby girl.
Right from the beginning, I felt that his family did not treat my children as they would their own. For instance, during my pregnancy, they invited their former daughter-in-law (Daniel's brother's ex-wife) for Christmas dinner because of their grandchildren but did not extend an invitation to my children's father (my ex-husband). They consistently attend my kids' sports events, dance performances, and generously give them Christmas and birthday presents. However, they have never volunteered to take my children to their extracurricular activities, something they do for their other grandchildren.
I shared my concerns with my boyfriend, explaining that I felt they were discriminating against my children, despite the fact that they are all cousins now. He believes I might be overthinking it and that his family genuinely loves my kids. I confronted his mother about this, and she assured me that she cares for my children but needs time to adjust to the complexity of our blended family.
Am I in the wrong to expect my boyfriend to distance himself from his parents because I feel they are discriminating against my children?