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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/morningstarbuckspost on 2023-09-29 23:35:48.
My wife and I adopted Mila (10), Grace (5), and Lucas (4) from foster care. Grace and Lucas were in a very loving home that would’ve adopted them if they could. We are still in contact with their foster parents and see them every few months.
Mila’s home was horrible. She was the first one that came to us and we spent nearly a month in the hospital and she needed a feeding tube when she came home. Mila has some special needs that are a direct result of that home.
A few months ago we got a call asking if we could take a 14 year old girl, Cassie, from the same home that Mila was in. Cassie’s needs aren’t as severe as Mila’s but between that and the fact that she’s years behind in school normal schooling would’ve been difficult for her.
My sister was a teaching assistant for special ed at our local school district. It was so bad that she didn’t even last a year there. When she heard about the girls, she said to not allow them to end up in special ed in our district.
My wife quit her job and homeschooled Mila for the first few months but she’s not a teacher and she doesn’t know how to help Mila the way she needed it.
We started looking for special needs schools and found one over an hour away that we love. My wife got a job in the office there so we got cheap tuition for Mila and eventually Cassie when she started school there. The girls are doing great at this school and we’re considering moving closer to it to make life a little easier.
The issue is my wife, Mila, and Cassie are out of the house by 6:30 every morning. Cassie is up by 5:30 and Mila is up by 6. They’re all tired when it’s time to go to school and work so as a treat, they go to Starbucks every morning. Mila gets a hot chocolate, Cassie is allowed to get a small coffee, and my wife gets a coffee to help them get through the morning.
They are not always the best at getting the cups out of the car by the time the younger two see it and lately they’ve been throwing temper tantrums every morning when we pass by a Starbucks.
My wife thinks we should just get it for them but I don’t want to. I think it’s a waste of money and they can have chocolate milk at home.
AITA for not getting them Starbucks?