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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/RealAd-1812 on 2023-09-17 08:04:26.

So my family threw my sister a gender reveal and asked all the siblings partners to be part of the reveal excluding mine even though he had been the longest in the family and we’re getting married soon and the others are just dating.

We then had a farewell to a cousin and again my fiancé was sent around like a delivery boy once the farewell celebrations had started. More events had occurred and each time it was noted by both of us. The fact that it seemed like they didn’t really want him around.

Now I know you’ll gonna be like but maybe they don’t like him or he’s rude or something. So in order to propose he done the old school thing and asked for my parents blessing and they gave it happily. After a few family events experiencing the shift I spoke to my family to let them know what’s been going on as maybe it was done unconsciously. And they promised to try harder.

The next was the final straw was my sister’s baby shower. We helped with the decorations and then my fiancé was told he needed to bbq for everyone but the bbq was set up at the back of the house and the event was happening in the front of the house. When we asked if everything can wait for the food to be finished and then start the celebrations we got told yes. This man prepared everything or at least what we thought was everything, because the moment he’d finish and the celebration started more food was brought to be bbq’d. I got dragged to MC the baby shower and had to leave him until he was done.

I felt bad and tried to get my brothers and even my sisters brothers in law to go assist in speeding up the bbqing process but they refused. He could hear the laughter and jokes being made but unfortunately was not there for anything. Once done mc’ing I pulled my mom to the side and said this is what I spoke about and it’s not fair that it’s been happening and nothing seems to change.

My fiancé wanted to leave without causing an argument. And so we did an Irish goodbye to most people but greeted those who were on the way out and made up an excuse of me not feeling well to leave so that it doesn’t take away from my sister’s day.

We’ve decided to limit contact and just take time to think about how to go forward. My mom has now turned the table saying it’s my fiancé’s fault we left early and that we aren’t attending any other family gatherings and not mentioning anything they’ve done prior.

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Hopeful_Duty_9793 on 2023-09-17 07:53:22.

I (37F) and my brother, Michael (40M), are both childfree. Our sister, Jennifer (31F), has one daughter, Emma (15F). She’s the only grandchild and nibling and we all adore her. Jen has made some questionable decisions in life and has struggled a bit but we’ve always been there to help her. Jennifer was just 16 when she had Emma so she lived with Michael and his husband until she was three while Jen was in school. I live near Michael and Emma saw me more than her own mother during that time.

When Emma was seven, Jennifer married a man with a daughter who is the same age as Emma and two younger kids. They’re not poor but with four kids they don’t have a lot of disposable income. Jennifer’s step kids have everything they need but not always everything they want. However, Michael, our parents, and I can afford to spoil Emma so we get her pretty much anything she wants. Despite this, she’s not spoiled and is a very well adjusted young lady. We give the stepkids gifts on birthdays and Christmas but Emma has more expensive things than them because we can afford to buy her a lot more than their parents. We also have a college fund for Emma that should cover most or all of her college costs.

Jennifer is usually glad that we love her daughter and understands that we don’t have the same bond with her step kids and cannot afford to spend as much money on them as we do on Emma. Jen’s husband does not like us very much. He is homophonic and doesn’t want Michael and his husband to be around his kids too much. He also thinks I’m a deviant because I’m single by choice, live with my best friend, and don’t want kids. We’ve argued with him many times because he thinks we’re a bad influence on Emma and his kids. Honestly, I don’t know what my sister sees in this guy.

Our latest argument happened because I bought Emma a homecoming dress. Her stepdad doesn’t like the boy she’s going with and told her that he’s not spending any of his money on a stupid dance. He doesn’t want to seem like a hypocrite, so he’s not buying his daughter a dress either. The dress cost about $500 including accessories. Emma’s stepsister had to buy her own dress. Michael also hosted a little after party for Emma’s friends.

Yesterday Emma’s stepdad called me and said that he doesn’t like my favoritism and if Michael and I can’t do as much for his kids then we need to do less for Emma. I basically told him to f*ck off (but in a somewhat polite way) and he is currently mad at me. Jen said he told Emma that she needs to stay away from. Jen thinks I could’ve at least bought her stepdaughter a cheaper dress but I don’t see why I should. She has two sets of parents who could’ve bought her a dress and I don’t have much of a relationship with her. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Heather_Bea on 2023-09-17 06:04:47.

My SO and I were initially planning a small, child-free wedding. When we mentioned it to his parents they were upset and basically threatened not to attend if his nephews couldn't come. We relented for them only, and have asked other people to make accommodations for their kids. Everyone else has been fine with this.

Between the time we started planning the wedding and now, my SIL divorced her husband. She asked us to switch her +1 to bring a friend who we do not know, and we said yes.

They will be driving in on Thursday for our wedding that is on Saturday. She just sent a text informing us that her +1 couldn't get childcare arrangements, and will be bringing her two elementary school aged daughters to our wedding.

We reminded her that we only wanted her kids, and she says she doesn't know what the big deal is and that if we don't allow the strangers kids she won't attend either.

I am upset for a number of reasons, and part of me wants to let her die on this hill if that is her choice. The other part of me thinks I wouldn't notice two additional kids as long as they are well behaved, but it's just unfair for the multiple other people who had to figure it out.

I just don't know how to tell her no without breaking an already fragile relationship that my SO has with his sister.

Edit: just to add, my SO wants his sister there and is considering giving in to her demands, but I want to hold our ground as it is our wedding and she should respect our choice.

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Kim_mklay on 2023-09-17 11:17:47.

I ( 28F) was getting married and i wanted everything to be perfect so I had some rules .

One of the important rules was not bringing kids to my wedding for various reasons . They could destroy the deco and what would I even do if they got hurt .

When I told my family and guests about this rule they all seemed to understand expect for my (30F) cousin . She said I was being rude and this was a way to not make her come to the wedding because I knew how clingy her kids are .(her kids are 3&4 yrs old)

I simply told her no I want my family to be there but no kids. She still made a fuss out of it and asked me why I didn't book a kids area . A kids area was out our budget so it was definitely no . I told if she can't come it's ok I understand .

The wedding day came and I didn't expect her to come but she did and she came with her 2 kids . I immediately rushed her out of my wedding and told i wasn't going to take this kind of disrespect. This made a whole scene delaying my wedding for 15 mins because a 30 Yr old woman who couldn't follow simple rules .

Some of family thinks I'm a**hole but some think I did the right thing .

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/sarahdragon26 on 2023-09-17 06:46:02.

Allow me to explain so no one thinks I am discriminating. I answered an ad online for a personal assistant that would help with filing and small errands. When the lady in question called me, she explained she had several problems, but I thought since I was just helping her with paperwork, they would not be a problem.

I met her Wednesday for my first day. She is wheelchair bound. She sprayed me with hand sanitizer right away, asking me to wear sleeves on my shoes, and don't touch anything. I was really confused because how could help her with paperwork if I couldn't touch anything. Then she said that my first job was to do her laundry, help her with her hair, mop the floors, then take her to the doctor. Now I am really confused because she mentioned none of this in the phone call.

Long story short, I drove her to two different doctors, the dmv, the food store, and several other places. Wasted half a tank of gas. I told her that I could only work until 6 or 7. Well, at 630, I was still waiting for her at the last doctor. I told her that I needed to go home, but she asked if my husband could make dinner for him and my son so I could continue to help her. I finally got out of there at 8pm and I was exhausted and furious.

I felt used. I did everything she asked me to because i wanted to help her, but she took advantage of me. I am currently seeing a physical therapist for an injury and she asked me to reschedule all my appointments to accommodate her. I said no.

To make matters worse, she wants me to drive 10 miles under the speed, she reached over to honk the horn if a car drove beside us (which i told her not to touch the wheel of my car), and wants me to roll through stop signs instead of stopping. I have NEVER felt so uncomfortable in my life.

Then today, after telling her in texts that I could no longer work for her, she begged to rethink my choice and tried to guilt me in working for her today. When I continued to tell her no, she turned aggressive and argumentative. In total, I think she sent me 10 to 12 messages and all them calling me all kinds of names. Telling me I was a lair and a cruel person. She has since changed her cragslist job post since she accused me of everything under the sun.

The reason why I feel terrible is because she told me goes to the church for food when she doesn't have money to buy food and that her money goes to doctors. Her apartment is basically empty expect for a couch, a bed, and a few other things. I wanted to help someone in need, but I feel so used and angry for allowing someone like her to get to me.

AITA?

Edit: In my text to her on how I couldn't work for her, I told her the reasons why and she continued to try to guilt me, then accused me of being a terrible person.

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Secret-Use5345 on 2023-09-17 11:06:06.

My ex (33f) and I (33m) share three children. Alannah (10), Jonah (8) and Callum (7). My ex cheated on me two years ago and left to be with her affair partner who is now her husband. She and I share custody of our children (50/50 timeshare) while they have full custody of her husband's two children from his previous marriage, that ended with the affair as well.

I was always an active dad in our kids lives and we had our own little traditions from baking brownies the day before they go back to school and having a little brownie party, to baking cookies for their birthdays and letting the birthday kid pick what kind we make, to doing a group photo for Halloween every year with our costumes and doing silly faces and our Christmas shopping day where I take the kids and we make a day out of buying the gifts. We go out to eat, get photos taken, sing Christmas songs in the car, etc. They might not be the most traditional traditions around but I have done this for years with the kids.

My ex asked our kids if we still did those things recently and they said yes. She then told me I should include her stepkids in these sometimes because our three are bonding during these experiences and are coming together as a group that doesn't include their stepsiblings and since her stepkids are not going to know our kids as stepsiblings but will only know them as siblings, because of the age and the fact they are always with my ex and their dad, it would be cruel to let them be frozen out like that when I could help the bond.

I told my ex I did not want to include her stepkids. I said she could come up with traditions for them to do as a family unit if she wants. But I am not going to be more involved with her cheating ass or her affair partner than I need to be. I told her being civil for the kids is the best we can ever be and there is no way I want to take responsibility or bond with her stepkids. She called me an ass and said I am putting my feelings before those of two young kids. She said it won't bother our kids at all because they'll always see the stepkids as interlopers but two little kids will always feel othered and it will be my fault because I'm a dick. She also accused me of being gleeful about the pain of kids. This is not true at all but she thinks that my having this boundary is me rubbing my hands together like a cartoon villain.

AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/throwaway35269269 on 2023-09-17 07:09:29.

My (32f) husband (36m) is really anti-body hair, I remember from years ago he stopped initiating sex when he noticed body hair, I asked him about it and he said its a huge turn off. Now I don’t really care about hair or no hair so I just did what he wanted me to do which was to shave.

Lately he has been really into growing a beard, he shows photos of random celebrities with beards and says how I feel about it. For me I really don’t like beards no reason, basically just like his problem with body hair, I have problem with facial hair. I asked him to please not grow it and shave what has been grown already. He denied saying that it’s his looks and he wants others to see his beard. I told him this basically is like me shaving my body for him, he goes on to say how he is the only seeing parts of my body and that nobody will notice me being shaved other than him. Which is untrue because I wear shorts a lot especially now that it’s summer and I play tennis with my friends, anyways that started a fight.

Well anyways i started not shaving my body after 3 days and I grow body hair fast I already haven’t shaved for 12/13? Days before the fight so i had a “beast legs” according to him. He called me ugly and I said I find him ugly for growing his beard. He still stands by his word. Well he kept leaving comments about my body hair and I finally snapped after a while and called him “a man-child for caring about small issues, and that maybe he should go work instead of worrying” he still wouldn’t be able to hide his ogre face and now he is mad at me and won’t talk to me.

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/throwRA221679 on 2023-09-17 02:10:37.

I (20f) recently bought a house. I noticed my house didn’t have a driveway and decided to get a yard survey done to see where I could put one in, if at all, since the houses are really close together.

During the survey, I learned that half of my neighbors 4 car driveway was mine, and started parking my car on my half of the driveway.

The neighbor came over and asked me what o was doing, and I explained that the survey showed half the driveway as mine. I also offered to show them the survey, which they refused.

They’re complaining that they used the driveway for 20+ years, and it’s still theirs as they’ve kept up the driveway and paving.

I told them maybe the previous owner never let them use it, but I don’t want my car on the street, especially when it snows.

I basically told them tough, and while it was unfortunate they didn’t know, I still fully intended on using it. This has made relationships really strained with my neighbor.

AITA for using my half of the driveway?

Edit: neighbors adult kids live there, so they have 4 cars

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Bitecutdegrade on 2023-09-17 08:52:29.

My husband met this girl online and says he's infatuated with her. They've known each other for 2 weeks and haven't even had a call or exchanged pics but apparently she's telling him she loves him and they're sexting a lot.

I told him either you cut things off with that girl or we are over but he said he needs her and that he would like both of us, but will choose her if forced to choose one.

I can't understand how can he possibly choose someone he doesn't even know over our 4 years together and our baby. Also how is he going to even meet her. She's in eastern Europe and my husband isn't working and has never worked. I'm the breadwinner, on mat leave now.

She seems like a scammer to me and I'm not sure if I should try to put this behind us when he figures it out. It's too hurtful that he was willing to choose her over his own family. Would it be understandable if I call it quits or should I try to put this behind us for our son once he finds out she's a scammer?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/captivebear on 2023-09-17 07:44:29.

My husband and I live in an area with bad schools, so to give her a better chance at getting into a good college we were going to have her live with my brother, his wife, and their kids during the school year and stay with us during the summer.

My daughter and I were going to stay at his house for one night just to tour a couple different schools and head back the next morning. That night my SIL decided something wasn’t right with her and took her to a hospital (we already signed the papers allowing them to take her). My husband and I were blamed for her health issues and my brother and SIL got custody of my daughter. They made some wild accusations to CPS and my step kids are now with their mom full time. I have not seen or heard from any of the kids since then.

My brother reached out and said that my daughter was missing a couple sentimental items and asked if I could mail them. I said no, she won’t get them back until she tells CPS the truth and gets everyone back home.

They’re telling the family I’m withholding a teddy bear and blanket from my sick daughter and making up shit about me and my husband mistreating the kids.

I’m now getting backlash from the family for not sending my daughter her stuff even though she’s putting us through a lot right now.

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/aitabear on 2023-09-17 06:36:08.

My wife, my FIL, and Rosie have been at the cabin for 4 days now. I ordered stuffed animals, window decals, art sets, a kiddie telescope and binoculars, a camera, and a couple chairs for her to sit outside.

My wife, FIL, and Rosie were able to go out a lot more than when we were there with the family and they were even able to visit a national park in the area.

Between Rosie’s new gear, the trips to the national park, and staying up late bear watching every night, she saw bears on more than one occasion. She’s feeling much better and they’re coming home on Monday.

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/AlicaCVI on 2023-09-17 04:52:27.

My(20m) gf(21f) asked me out two months ago.

Last year, when I was 19, my dog needed surgery. It was intestinal obstruction and my parents didn’t have money for it. When their friend who was 52 found out, she offered a solution. She paid me for sex, giving enough money to pay for the surgery.

I never told my gf this but my sister said I’m a jerk for not telling her, saying that she deserves to know that her bf used to be a prostitute. AITA for not telling my gf?

UPDATE : After reading all the comments, I decided to tell my gf now rather than have her find out further down the line or from my sister, in case she considers it a dealbreaker. Fortunately, she’s really understanding so we’re good.

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Rizeopsfw on 2023-09-17 03:08:35.

My(15m) mom(54) married him(34) last year. I live with my dad who called my mom to tell her that the dog they raised together, my childhood dog, was going to be put down. My mom declined to be in the room, saying it would hurt too much. Her new husband told my dad that he shouldn't let me be in the room since it will traumatize me. I insisted on being in the room and was in the room when Matt crossed the rainbow bridge. Had to say my final goodbye and be there for him when he needed me the most.

Mom's husband got really upset at and tried telling off my dad so I told him "Shut it. It's none of your business. He's my dad and you're not, so stop trying." My mom later told me I could have been a bit more civil since he is still her husband and 'had good intentions'.

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Agreeable-Yam3062 on 2023-09-17 02:46:49.

Me (43M) and my wife (45) have lived together for 12 years. My stepdaughter Kat (24) does not work and lives with us. I work full time, my wife sometimes part time.

Kat suffers from severe social anxiety, and has written a note to her mother about not wanting to live anymore when she was only 14; reason being that she was too afraid to go to school. She's been through three therapists since and has been with the fourth for over a year now. She would leave therapy for a while, then 'relapse' and return a few months/years later.

This might sound callous, but even though she has been officially diagnosed, Kat's disorder is not very visible. She's very introverted and dislikes family gatherings, prefers staying at home over doing any activity and even going on vacation with us, but that aside she's normal. She can hold a conversation fine, and has plenty of online friends that she talks to daily. It never seemed like a huge issue, as she did graduate just fine, but it's become a problem ever since said graduation.

Kat went to university and even moved out to do so for a year, but came back home after not attending classes after the first month and then obviously failing them. She claims it was because classes were too difficult to keep up with while also having to be among people all day, so she stopped going and shut herself in her dorm room.

I know she's not stupid, but she is also not very ambitious. This is another problem, as she has had severe difficulty finding work after she's come home. She worked for a few weeks after we found her a job working in a school kitchen, but was fired. Her work ethic as a whole was reportedly okay - again, not stupid, just little effort.

Since then, she's applied to very few jobs and gotten no interviews. She specifies her disorder in every job application. I believe this is a stupid idea, as employers would probably skip over any applicants that have issues from the get go, especially because she doesn't outwardly show that she has a disorder anyway. I think Kat knows this as well, and does it on purpose.

After so many years of being in and out of therapy for something that she has always lived/managed with, I can't help but feel like she has just weaponized it to not have to work.

My wife supports her daughter fully, and has even taken on to working herself so that she doesn't feel guilty about me supporting her daughter. She doesn't have to do this; I make enough money for all three of us and Kat doesn't cause any expenses beyond food and affordable clothing. Kat feels guilty in turn because of this, but nothing has changed with her behavior.

I think it would be better if Kat just worked and moved out to learn some independence. My wife thinks this would only make Kat miserable and that we should support her since she is 'working on it' in therapy. I don't know how long we have to wait until Kat will be done 'working on it' - it's been over 10 years.

AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Char_7maina on 2023-09-17 01:02:31.

My husband has 2 kids from a previous 9f and 7m. The kids have been with my husband 100% of the time since my husband and his ex broke up. She has not been very involved in their lives since the youngest was just a year old. They do not have a relationship with their mom, however, her mother and grandmother do visit the kids, but not often. I’ve known the kids since they were 3 and 5.

I’ve traveled a lot during my childhood and as an adult. It’s something that the kids are really interested in. I go on vacation multiple times a year and unfortunately, my husband and the kids could never travel with me outside the US. The kids need a letter of permission to travel abroad, which was hard for us to get since his ex never answered his emails.

My family and I have been planning a trip to Paris and Kyoto to visit my maternal grandmother and paternal grandparents for Christmas and New Year. My entire family is going on this trip, my parents, in-laws, siblings, cousins, nieces, and nephews. We’ve been planning this trip for over 2 years and we finally bought our plane tickets after my son was born eight weeks ago. My husband’s ex has also signed the letter of permission, so everything is already in order for the trip.

Last weekend my husband’s ex sent him an email regarding our trip. She basically asked if we could cancel our trip, so the kids could spend Christmas with their great-grandmother. Their great-grandmother is supposedly ill and they’re not sure if she’s going to be here next year.

My husband immediately wanted to reject that idea, but I asked him to think about it.

I think it might be good for the kids to stay behind with their grandma. They’ll get to see their great-grandma for maybe for the last and they’ll also see their mom. I know the kids are very excited to travel abroad, but do think this is more important than Paris or Kyoto. Both are just cities they won’t go anywhere and we can visit in summer. I told my husband all of this and he argued that we’d probably not get the money back we already spend. I told him that we bought business-class plane tickets and I know we’ll get that back.

My husband just got angry and told me that we’re not going to discuss it anymore. My parents and siblings are on his side, but I feel like they’re only looking at the money. When I was a kid my parents also left my siblings and me in Kyoto with my grandparents to go on a trip. At the time I was also angry about it, but as an adult am very happy that I got to spend that time with my grandparents.

I think this is also the case for the kids. They probably won’t be happy about it now, but will really appreciate it when they’re older. My husband disagreed with this and told me I was not looking at the kids’ situation and was angry when I again suggested canceling their trip. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Fun-Cicada-6566 on 2023-09-17 04:07:09.

I did not know she was married. When she got pregnant she broke it of with me and ghosted me. I'm not on the birth certificate. Her husband is.

I didn't even know she had a kid. Her husband did a 23 and me for the kid as a school project and found out he wasn't related to the kid. They are getting divorced. They had a prenup so she is screwed. She got ahold of me and says she wants child support. I told her to take me to court. I honestly don't even know if the kid is mine.

She found my parents and told them lies that they chose to believe because they want a grandkid. They called me irresponsible and said they are ashamed of me. They will not listen to my side but I think I'm in the clear here.

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Material-Career-8974 on 2023-09-17 03:15:04.

I 26m work full-time for a Police department as one of their tow truck operators. On a given day I will do anything and everything from picking up seized vehicles to helping officers if their cars break down/get damaged. While I love my job and am proud of it the same thing can't be said for my 16F sister Emily. This has led to my current issues with her and our parents over the favors I do for them every school year.

For years now during the school year, one of the things I do is drive Emily and her friends home after school. I do this to spare the parents having to make the 20-35 minute drive twice a day. This hasn't been an issue until this year when a new dress code into effect for all of us tow truck drivers. Two weeks ago as part of a push for safety, all of us got new uniforms that were designed to replicate what our officers wear.

Since adopting them they have done their job well as more people are slowing down and moving over for us. This sadly is where the problems begin as Emily and her friends hate this new uniform and find it embarrassing. As a result of this, they have been demanding I change every day before I go to pick them up. My response to this has always been no and that they need to suck it up if they want a ride.

Not happy with this they complained to my parents a week ago who tried to get me to cave to their demands. When I told them no as well this led to a huge argument in which I decided to stop helping them. This has led to the other parents getting upset as now Emily and her friends have to use public transit which takes them an hour to get home.

Am I the asshole?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/throwaway-roommate13 on 2023-09-17 02:44:00.

I (20F) live in student housing with 5 roommates. One of them (23M), Mark, constantly borrows and damages my things (dishes get returned dirty or not at all, broke my vaccuum, ripped my sponge in half somehow, …), so I keep my stuff in my room.

I have a shoe rack outside my door though, due to being a neat freak, and recently I treated myself by buying a pair of expensive shoes (330€ Naked Wolfe stretch boots). This is very exceptional since I usually live a pretty frugal lifestyle.

Two weeks ago I ran into Casey, Mark’s gf who often spends the night at his dorm, and she complimented my shoes, we had a small conversation about it but that was it. The next morning they were gone. I texted our hallways gc but no one knew what happened to them.

After this I ran into Casey in the hallway again and guess what she was wearing… that’s right my boots. I confronted her about this and she told me she decided to buy them after our conversation, but I know that that’s bs since she’s always complaining about her lack of money and she also doesn’t work.

Upon further questioning her she got visibly upset and stormed out. I’ve tried talking to mark about it and at first he was adamant she must’ve bought them herself. I told him that if that’s so she shouldn’t mind showing me her receipt, and if she didn’t I’d go to campus security.

After this he quickly changed his tune, he admitted Casey took them and he'd return them. When he did though, i noticed two big slits were cut into each boot. Apparently Casey couldn't fit into the boots because of her wide calves so she decided to 'modify' them.

I told Mark she ruined the boots and they had to find a way to reimburse me. He told me they couldn't beceause they didn't have that kind of money to spare right now. I told him it's not my problem and that Casey should've thought of that before stealing and wrecking mine.

I tried going to security but they said they couldn't help. So I did something much pettier instead. I took all of mark’s dishes, silverware, electronics, … out of the kitchen and set up a table outside of the dorms and sold it. I still only got like 150€, not even half the cost of the boots, but at least it’s something.

When mark found out he was furious but there wasn’t really anything he could do since none of my stuff is in the common areas, and again campus security is useless. From what I’ve seen he’s eating off of paper plates rn.

The other roommates are kind of devided. One of the other girls in the hall thinks that what I did is petty but fair. Taking other people’s stuff is a pattern for mark and it was about time he got some consequences. The other girl is devided, she thought something had to be done but I took it too far. The two guys think I’m insane for what I did over ‘a stupid pair of shoes.’

So Reddit AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/bakedbac0n on 2023-09-16 20:29:47.

I (24F) have an autistic little brother (11M) who constantly annoys me. He's a spoiled brat and always makes a fuss out of being told no. Whenever i'm in a family gathering nobody cares about anything except him and it's starting to get annoying. He would always start trying to gain attention when he isn't the center of attention. The day i finally snapped was when he started screaming for me to give my phone to him, i refused (of course) because he has his own, when he heard that he started screaming at me then yanked my phone to the ground breaking it. I finally snapped and told him "I don't care about you! You're probably the worst person in this family! I hate you, you ruined this family!" He started screaming violently which caught everyone's attention, then they all tried defending him (like they always do) I proceeded to tell them "F this family!" before leaving.

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Impressive-Switch838 on 2023-09-17 02:30:31.

Throw away account. I went to go pick up bowels my sil had borrowed from my wife and when I went inside, sil and her wife asked me if I could father a baby with her, so that they could experience motherhood. I was taken aback, and then they said that they can't afford IVF, so it will have to be done naturally. Ngl if I was younger and had no wife, it would have been a definite yes, but I want to have children with my wife and only my wife. Sil, wife realized I wasn't taking it to well and she apologized for springing it on me so suddenly. I asked why me? Sil said she's known me all my life and she knows my background and that I'm healthy. I said no. Sil wife said that's okay, but my sil got upset and accused me off being homophobic and other nasty things that I don't care to repeat. Her wife had to take her out the room and I left.

My wife wasn't home when I got back. I had to block my sil because she was just sending nasty texts and voice mails. When my wife got back, she asked what happened, that sil been sending her messages and calling me a homophobic. I told my wife what happened and she went nuclear on her sister. Long story short, they want nothing to do with each other. FIL and MIL said I should have just kept it to myself to save all this trouble and there family split apart because I couldn't keep my mouth shut! AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/AgitatedPrize391 on 2023-09-16 22:24:29.

Please read my comments before giving a judge because I have more background.

I (39m) gave my daughter (10) an iphone SE two days ago, me and her mother (37) have been separated since she was 5. Well my daughter is really into privacy and she set a passcode on her phone, I have the code written down on a notebook that includes passwords just in case she forgets. Yesterday her mom texted me and asked what the passcode is, I texted back saying why does she want to know. She said that she wants to check who she is in contact with and what social media’s she using, I told her that if our daughter isn’t telling her then she shouldn’t think that I will tell her because a kid deserves privacy, and I can easily check who she’s in contact with when she visits me and if anything is wrong I’ll tell her.

Well she told me that we need to know as soon as possible and that she could be foolish and put herself in danger within the time that she is at her place, (our daughter is at her mom’s for 4 days but I do see her in those 4 days because her school is close enough to my work and I sometimes pick her up to go to cafes or parks for an hour or two before her mother picks her up) I said “i can check her phone even on days you have her because it’s on school days” she got frustrated told me that she has the right to know and hung up, I asked my daughter if she even wants her mother to know her passcode and she said she doesn’t know but she wants her phone to be hers only and less people knowing is better.

So AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/MorgsOD on 2023-09-16 22:08:03.

I (M22) have been in a relationship with my girlfriend (F20) for a year. She was showing me new underwear she bought the other day and was trying the new sets on. The exact words I said were "Wow, that's nice inir" "That looks nice" "You look nice in that" "That colour is proper nice" "That colour is lush on you" "Very nice, love"

She's now calling me the AH for saying she looks nice in her underwear because she believes that the word nice is subjective, and means "alright" or ehh, half an half."

My side of it is i'm using the word nice because I believe where I'm from it's a word that just means it's up top. looks good and I like it a lot.

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/babypinkmatcha on 2023-09-16 21:20:25.

They hired me to pressure wash their driveway and do some wiring in their basement. We agreed I would work for $20/hour. My wife is pregnant and I'm currently unemployed, so I was happy to have the opportunity to work. Come the end of the week, I had worked a total of 31 hours, and was expecting to earn at least $600, maybe slightly less. Instead, I get a lengthy message from my sister in law that they decided to only pay $400 because I'm a smoker so they took it upon themselves to subtract smoke breaks. That would amount to hours upon hours of smoking! The basement is not finished, but my wife and I agreed in order to save ourselves from future situations like this, I shouldn't do more jobs for them. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/JadeHale on 2023-09-16 23:22:01.

Okay, some context. My (32F) ex-husband (49M) and I get along well for the most part. We co-parent our 9 year old daughter on a mostly 50/50 basis with me having her for a few extra days a month due to his fly-in/fly-out schedule for work.

The only areas we butt heads with are his lack of communication and nutrition when it comes to our daughter. (The nutrition thing is a pain to deal with but ultimately not the issue at hand here). Since we've been divorced, about 5 years now, he has consistently forgotten to communicate when he needs me to take her early for him, or on days when it would typically be his week with her. I've raised my concerns with him each time and asked him to give me more than a day or two notice when he needs me to take her, but he has failed to do so each time. Because I obviously want my daughter with me as much as possible, I always take her anyway and reschedule any plans I may have made for myself that conflict.

Recently, he and I were talking on the phone and he says to me, 'you know you're taking her for 3 weeks as of tomorrow right?' I did not. He mentioned that he was thinking about taking holidays in September way back in April, did not say when in September and never brought it up again.

I had appointments booked for my week without her and an overnight trip planned. Out of frustration with him and his pattern of disrespect for me and my time, I refused to take her. My thoughts being, if I keep doing this for him he will continue to forget and things will never change. I am a very passive person and he knows this. I decided to stand up for myself and not accept his walking all over me.

He got extremely upset with me, and has demanded that he can not count on me for anything, and that he will no longer help me out when I need him to take her. Keep in mind, he has never taken her for me on his days off or helped out in that way whatsoever for me, so this really doesn't effect me in any way at all. He claims he cancelled his vacation and wasted $1000 on it now because he has no childcare for his week with her.

I understand his frustration with cancelling his vacation. He on the other hand does not understand my frustrations with his lack of communication and has been cold with me since. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/NationalParticular36 on 2023-09-16 22:28:12.

I’ve been in a relationship with a girl for several months now. We just bought a house and moved in together and got engaged. She’s a 5 years older then me and she has 2 young kids from a previous relationship. She’s currently in a custody battle with her ex and doesn’t want him to have custody. Only very limited visitation. She works nights 3 days a week and I take care of her kids. I’m starting to realize she’s really lazy. Sometimes she’s off during the day and I’m still stuck with the kids. There 2 year old twins so they are a lot of work. They also don’t listen to me and there a little wild. She’ll just go out and not say when she’s coming back and I could be stuck with them for hours. It happens all the time. We went to a party at her families house and I had to chase them around the wholes time while she didn’t do anything it was really humiliating. She doesn’t really have a good reason why she doesn’t want her ex to have the kids, I suspect it’s more to get back at him for dumping her. I want to tell her I’m done being her babysitter. I know she’ll be mad.