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submitted 1 week ago by genfood@feddit.org to c/programmer_humor@programming.dev

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[-] ramjambamalam@lemmy.ca 71 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

        Push directly to master, not main
No command line args, just change the global const and recompile
No env vars either
Port numbers only go up to 5280, the number of feet in a mile
All auth is just a password; tokens are minority developers, not auth, and usernames are identity politics
No hashes – it's the gateway drug to fentanyl
No imports. INTERNAL DEVELOPERS FIRST
Exceptions are now illegal and therefore won't occur, so no need to check for them
SOAP/XML APIs only
No support for external machines. If it's good enough for my machine, it's good enough for yours.


      

[-] rikudou@lemmings.world 17 points 1 week ago

Exceptions are now illegal and therefore won't occur, so no need to check for them

Ah, I see you've met C++ developers.

[-] excral@feddit.org 8 points 1 week ago

No command line args, just change the global const and recompile

Nah, don't use global variables, magic values everywhere. And don't use const whatsoever, we need to move fast and break things, we can't let something immutable stop us