Part of the problem is that our models of knowledge were flawed. The basis was the information deficit model; the assumption was that people were missing data, and that if they learned more they would shift their understanding.

It turns out that this isn't a good fit for human psychology, but approaches based on it still persist today.

Another problem is a fundamental misunderstanding of world views. People on the left tend to think that equality is a good thing and should be a goal. People on the right do not believe in equality. Not in the sense that they opposed it, they literally don't believe it is possible. So any attempt to improve the lot of the worst-off is interpreted as an attempt to disrupt the hierarchy, ultimately ending up worse off for themselves. "You're just jealous and want to be in charge."

I think that there are communication strategies that can work, but maybe not. Humans have suffered under hierarchy for millennia, and maybe we are too flawed as a species.

It may seem unfair that the left would have to put so much effort into communicating with the right, who doesn't give a fuck. That's true, but the forces of hierarchy have had many more centuries to refine their propaganda. And what the left asks is for change and growth, while the right merely asks for a return to the way humans lived for most of civilization: a powerful few getting all the benefits and most of humanity struggling to survive.

You're not wrong, "Being reasonable" can be saying "you are wrong! And here's why..." and as you said, that doesn't work. And kindness doesn't work either. I suggest we be less confrontational when trying to help them understand other views. It's hard and nuisanced. It's like saying "I'm not against you, but you're choices and support are not working the way you think they are", but in a clever way that isn't so obvious.

Yeah, fuck these guys that are trampling over human right... but like, I also would like change to happen. Being reasonable and kind isn't working. Neither is aggression.