It can be hard to break that wall. I walked into my transition knowing that I was putting my marriage, my shelter, my everything on the line by coming out. I spent months quietly crying to myself in the bathroom, scared of both sides. Wishing it could be easier, hating myself for even wanting this.

It took realizing that there was an inevitable end either way, I just had the choice of being alive or not for it. It took time for me to find new support, and in that between, I felt extremely alienated.

Even trying to be in trans spaces online, I felt like I couldn't talk about what I was experiencing, about the negatives that can come, and how it still felt worth it to really breathe as me, as the woman who had been screaming behind every word for so much of my life.

It can be an ugly experience, and we can feel like there's no one there to help catch us as we fall. That's why one of the best things we can do is never tell someone they're whatever, but to let them know that, if they are, they aren't alone. There's still people who will help them through the hardest.