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Dimensional lumber tape measure
(slrpnk.net)
I hope it’s not against the rules here, just saw this woodworking related xkcd that I enjoyed and thought it might be appreciated here:)
Nah, it’s just they buy wet wood and it twists as it dries. Also, places like Lowe’s likes to stack a lot of wood vertically, so they get that nice bow in them for all those rocking chairs people want to build.