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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/spykid on 2023-09-21 05:52:39.


About 4 years ago, my cousin married a woman who I felt was a gold digger. Recently, they finalized a divorce and he got pretty screwed financially (he will still be fine). He found out I had made comments about her before they got married and got upset with me for not talking to him about it.

Some background - my cousin is a pretty successful guy. Started multiple tech companies and made a bunch of money at a young age. When he started dating his ex wife, I suspected she was in it for the money. My assumption was always that he knew what the deal was. He's a highly intelligent guy, but he's pretty socially awkward and not conventionally attractive. She seemed like a materialistic, wannabe Instagram model. It was pretty obvious to me but I was happy for him for getting attention from an attractive woman. Might as well have some fun after all his hard work, right?

Well not long after they started dating, I heard they got engaged. My mom shared the news with me and my immediate reaction was less than enthusiastic, so she pried. I told her it seemed like his fiance was only interested in his money but conceded that I don't see them enough (living in a different city) so maybe things are better than I think. She scolded me for saying that and I felt like a bit of an asshole. My family seemed to really like her, so I never brought it up again. They got married, had a kid, etc.

Well the divorce happened and it was not amicable. I guess she got A LOT of his assets, like millions. She's also being very difficult about their kid. My mom and aunt (his mom) approached me on my last visit home and asked how I knew years earlier. I told them I felt like it was pretty obvious and I was honestly surprised no one in the family felt that way. Then a couple days later my cousin approached me. He felt like I was talking shit behind his back (it was literally that one time) and I should have talked to him about it. I'm kind of annoyed that he found out about what I said, but my mom and aunt are notorious for having big mouths so I should have known better. I also don't think I am close enough to my cousin that he would have taken me seriously. He feels like I could have saved him from a miserable marriage experience, losing a bunch of assets, and having to now deal with child custody issues. My mom and aunt aren't too happy with me about it either, even though my mom basically stopped me from saying anything.

So, AITA?

TL;DR - Cousin married a gold digger and I voiced my suspicion behind his back, one time, before they got married. He got screwed in the divorce and feels like I should have talked to him about it.

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[-] Spacehooks@reddthat.com 1 points 1 year ago

Might have done the same. Ultimately that was his own choice to marry her without prenuptial.

this post was submitted on 21 Sep 2023
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