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this post was submitted on 09 Jul 2023
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No Stupid Questions
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I’ve felt that way a lot in my life. I dropped out of college and lived essentially in my parents basement until my mid 20s. Turns out I had a bad case of undiagnosed depression and ADHD. I kinda naturally worked my way out of the depression mostly. I’ve fallen back in a few times. And that entire time I could think about anything but how little I’ve done with my life. How boring I must sound talking to anyone because I have zero experiences. But about 8 years ago, I got diagnosed and medicated.
I’m just some average guy, now with 2 kids and a wife, and I work 55 hours a week. It took a lot of work and finding good medications for me, but I’m honestly the happiest I’ve ever been. And I recently noticed I don’t dwell on comparing myself to others anymore and it’s been freeing. I don’t need to be distinguished for anything more than being a good father, husband, and human. And that’s enough for me.
I'm suffering from a similarly-caused "unexperiencedness" of but thankfully I could get out it before it in just two years - which is really still long enough to make you feel missing out. I have far fewer to tell people about but thankfully I still manage to be somewhat interesting most of the time, especially recently. On unrelated note, tips on how to build experiences and things to talk about post-recovery, or mitigate the effect of effectively doing nothing in the last years?
I definitely think of what would happen if I just, you know, didn't get depressed at all and worked on myself.
If I don't compare myself I think I'll miss out from seeing some fundamental perspective. I benefitted so much from comparing myself with people after that unlucky period. But the unhealthy comparisons I made during that period made me go all the way downhill. It probably depends a lot on how you view it.