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"Just Season It" by Mr.Lovenstein
(telegra.ph)
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I didn't even think you could do that to asparagus. That's seriously demonic.
Whoever invented canned asparagus belongs in extra hell
As well as spinach.
I actually liked canned spinach a lot as a kid, only vegetable I'd eat for a time. Still think it's okay, but prefer fresh, raw spinach these days