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"Mad? Mad?! I'm not mad! Maybe a little angry..."
I feel you though. It's why Ænima is one of my top played songs on Spotify recently. I wanna flush it all away...
Even I beforehand, before I took on my first day at college some months ago, realized how crapsack (for lack of a better term) the world actually is, especially for neurodivergent young adults like me, and how many others in my age range would rather go hikokomori and focus on doing their own creative thing rather than serve the uninspired and haughty. Some deal with unbridled anger, others with anguish, others with keeping a false positive façade, while others try to keep it neutral and normal under the hood...
Maybe that's why one of my recent favorite tracks nowadays comes from the OMORI OST, that being "It Means Everything". Alongside Derivakat's newest EP yet, they convey what it means to be both confused and so distraught with anger from all the hardships we face in our later teenage stage of life, including the ever-increasing "I-don't-care-about-everything-anymore" attitude prevalent amongst teenagers and YAs, especially with troubled childhoods and broken friendships.