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xkcd #2862: Typical Seating Chart
(imgs.xkcd.com)
Alt text:
Now that airlines have started adding wheel locks to their drink carts, less than half of flights have one accidentally fall out through the hole.
Wow, has it been that long since I last flew? We didn't even have the hole, let alone the tail gunners. Once we'd hit an aircow or two we'd have swarms of them coming at us constantly, biting at the tail of the plane. Meanwhile the first set of pilots are being replaced because the lack of cow catcher just let them right in through the front windshield. Truly a terrible experience, 7/10 would fly again but only on sale.
And you can't even smoke any more.
You still can smoke on planes. It just got much more expensive.
Not if you only smoke cock.
Not if the lookouts catch you
Not if the lookouts smoke cock
And then you can’t get on a plane anymore afterwards.