this post was submitted on 03 Feb 2024
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Look, if you had lotus, fireball, mox, and channel in your opener you deserve to win that game
If you're even known to own a Lotus nobody will even come near you. It's been enough to keep me safely separated from the game for decades. It's kind of like having a nuke in your sidecar.
Until a man is twenty-five, he still thinks, every so often, that under the right circumstances he could be the baddest motherfucker in the world. If I moved to a martial-arts monastery in China and studied real hard for ten years. If my family was wiped out by Colombian drug dealers and I swore myself to revenge. If I got a fatal disease, had one year to live, devoted it to wiping out street crime. If I just dropped out and devoted my life to being bad. Hiro used to feel that way, too, but then he ran into Raven. In a way, this is liberating. He no longer has to worry about trying to be the baddest motherfucker in the world. The position is taken.
I feel like if anyone in my playgroup ever got one we'd let them keep it in the deck until they get a real satisfying win from it, then either they take it out or everyone is allowed a proxy of it. Or possibly a 'special occasion' card like their birthday or if they've had a rough week and just need a win. I've also been known to keep some messed up cards in my side board in case someone joins our pod and they end up being an asshole, I can swap out and get them to pick up their ball and go home
I can dig it. If somebody is being an ass, I tend to bring out this one.
All your creatures are dead. Your dog is dead. Your cat is dead. Your mom is dead. Your friends are dead. The fleas in your underpants are dead. Everyone you ever knew is dead. You are dead. One million damage to you and everyone who looks like you.
Rocks. Fall.
Everyone. Dies.
This isn't the most powerful combo especially against multicolor decks with lots of fancy mana producers, but I'm partial to this combo in my mono green commander:
Nobody expects green to vaporize all the islands out of a deck or whatever. Big "fuck you and the horse you rode in on" energy. That whole deck is a nonsense engine, mono green but wins without attacking (mostly direct damage or milling). A lot of people don't know how to play against it so it is especially fun to bother cocky players with expensive decks but little experience
You got a decklist?
This is outdated I've scaled back the control some in favor of power artifacts. Also the "side board" is like another 30 or so cards I swap chunks out for depending on the feel (like if I want to do group hug, play to win, fuck with a specific person in the playgroup, etc). But should get the general idea across: https://tappedout.net/mtg-decks/heckin-snekin-elf-control/
Interesting, thanks for sharing! How often do you get your commander out, I'm wondering? I imagine playing all of the mana dorks likely nets you lots of mana early on, but 8 cmc is quite a lot still
It can be a bit rough to get them out sometimes especially with how few land are in the deck. I usually aim to have them out turn 5 or 6 but sometimes I never pull off getting them out. Part of the current deck list is having more viable options if they aren't on the board. The whole deck can be stopped dead if someone targets the commander and I over invest trying to bring them out again
I like it.
My fav from back in the day was Wirewood Channeler + Pemmin's Aura + any other elf, then something like Demonfire or Warbreak Trumpeter.