20 packets is a very small sample size.

ping also won't necessarily capture all lost packets over wifi. Many are lost and re-transmitted by the wifi hardware without anything higher in the stack being aware.

Online shooters are always a no win situation anyhow, unless you happen to be one of the top 200 players of that game in your region. Outside of that all the games place you with a bunch of similar stat players. You don’t play with all random people. You get grouped up with people like you, so you never really get to even know if you’re “one of the best” players or if you’re worse than most. You either play them to be extremely competitive and you’re one of a handful of players good enough to actually be one of the best, or you’re just playing for fun. If you’re just playing for fun then 20ms is really, really, not important.

This is just not true. I play online shooters pretty casually, but I've been playing them regularly since 2001. When my ping time in Overwatch or Apex goes from the usual 35 to 55-60, it feels pretty noticeable in-game. Even though I'm nowhere near top 500. If you don't notice the difference, that is great, but it doesn't mean everyone else has the same experience.