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submitted 9 months ago by Gaywallet@beehaw.org to c/lgbtq_plus@beehaw.org
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[-] Zworf@beehaw.org 13 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Seeing the same things happening in the states but worse pains me greatly.

What's even worse IMO is that it seems to be worsening. A lot of countries were pretty backwards in the past but we've come a long way through emancipation. But now things seem to be reversing.

It feels like LGBTQ+ rights are worse off now than they were 20 years ago. Not just in the US. One of my friends in the Netherlands was foaming at the mouth about his children being 'indoctrinated'. Asking more about this, it turned out they had received a standard and pretty mild educational programme aimed at understanding of non-CIS relationships. Nothing actually 'indoctrinating' and the other BS he was spewing (like that 8-year-olds are physically transitioning which is just complete nonsense, it's a strict 18-yo minimum with an exception of puberty blockers only where absolutely needed) was just made up too. He seems to be totally mindfucked by extreme-right propaganda (who won 24% in the last elections here, sadly). I tried to show him the facts but he's been so screwed up by extreme-right tiktok propaganda that there was no point. Soon after this he began foaming about 'woke'. I had to block him and he was a friend for 20 years.

We can't change the past, sad as it is, but the outlook for the future doesn't look good. I dont really know what to do about this, I've tried confronting him with facts but there was just no effect. And continuing to engage with him hurts me so I'm kinda done with that.

And don't forget the Netherlands was traditionally quite LGBTQ+ friendly (at least since the 60s/70s, before that it was just as bad as the rest really)

[-] Gaywallet@beehaw.org 5 points 9 months ago

We can’t change the past, sad as it is, but the outlook for the future doesn’t look good. I dont really know what to do about this, I’ve tried confronting him with facts but there was just no effect. And continuing to engage with him hurts me so I’m kinda done with that.

Unfortunately the only way to reach people like this is to listen to them and expose them to another viewpoint but without challenging their beliefs. It's a skill that can be learned, but also it requires a lot of emotional bandwidth and it is absolutely emotional labor. You have every right to be done with him and no obligation to help him out, but if you do want to learn more about how exactly you can persuade someone out of being brainwashed I'd recommend the following three books (in that order) for some perspective and thoughts on the matter:

  1. How Minds Change by David McRaney
  2. The Persuaders by Anand Giridharadas
  3. Escaping the Rabbit Hole by Mick West
this post was submitted on 21 Feb 2024
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