Kind of an odd suggestion, and I know this might not work if you’re someone who wants to place themselves in the story, but if you’re looking for healthier, better adjusted men in literature, try some queer or gay romance. Not sure exactly your desired age/reading level, but Red, White, and Royal Blue is cute, and while socio economic status makes the main character slightly less relatable, it’s still a nice read. There’s plenty of other excellent queer romance that has well written men. If you also enjoy fantasy and political intrigue, Priory of the Orange Tree has excellent world building and a few romance subplots I think are very sweet.

EDIT: Somehow missed the “nerdier” part. Let me do some library diving and give more accurate suggestions