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this post was submitted on 09 Jun 2024
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My dad's no longer paying anything to her, and he wasn't contributing to any retirement account for her when they were married
Guess he should have been doing that. And maybe she should have been somewhat aware of their financial situation. It sounds like your mom is a product of her own poor decisions.
She's doing fine as a landlord, thank you
Well, at least until legislation like this comes to where she’s at, at least. Then the free ride will be over.
It's not a "free" ride, it's her life savings
The reason why she was involved with real estate is the beneficial tax treatment for capital gains when selling
The government encourages investment into real estate in the first place
So she had money to buy real estate but not put in a retirement fund, ok. It also doesn’t sound like “her life savings” as much as it is someone else’s income in the form of rent.
This just circles all the way back to the comment you originally replied to. It’s difficult to be sympathetic to somebody who retires and lives off of somebody else’s hard earned money, as opposed to the person who retires and lives off their own hard earned money.
You’re describing a woman who has lived her entire life on somebody else’s dime and will continue to do so, with their only measurable contribution being to you and your siblings/father. So I understand where your sympathy is coming from and that’s totally understandable. But you have to understand that trying to apply that to people outside of your family means next to nothing to anyone else but you.
You literally can't put that money into a retirement fund because she has no earned income
So this money she used to buy real estate materialized out of thin air and nobody paid taxes on it?
Did she win it in a contest? Dig it out of the ground?
Divorce settlement
She was an unpaid maid, cook, gardener for 30 years. I think she deserves to retire at 65
You’re avoiding the question. Where did this “life savings” money come from that it wasn’t income for either your mom or your dad? The things you’re saying don’t add up at all.
Taking care of the children you chose to have and doing chores that literally everyone on the planet has to do is not deserving of some special consideration or award. I’m an unpaid maid, cook, and gardener too, as well as an unpaid electrician and plumber when necessary, and then I also have to go to work full time. In doing so I will retire using my own hard earned money, not someone else’s. Your mom worked half as hard as the average adult today and she “deserves” to retire at the expense of other people? Yeah right.
If your mom’s level of labor for you was so beneficial to you and you believe so strongly that she deserves to retire, then how about you pay for her to retire? Are you not the one she did all this “unpaid” work for? It’s touching that you have so much love and respect for your mother, but once again that doesn’t mean anything to anyone else but you.
The way you’re describing this situation your mom lived a privileged life and never earned her own money and your dad didn’t consider retirement for either of them and now she somehow was gifted a bunch of money to buy real estate and live off of somebody else’s dime. You need to understand that this life path is not going to be respected by society at large. Nobody is going to tell you that you shouldn’t love and respect your own mother but you’re not convincing anyone on here to either.
She got it from the divorce settlement. Are you going to say that women should get nothing from a divorce? My dad didn't cook or clean. You're doing that for one person, my mom did the cleaning, cooking, shopping for the three of us.
And yes, I did loan my mom a lot of money for her housing construction projects. Who wouldn't? LMAO
You can invest divorce settlement money. I also cook clean and do shopping for three while working a full time job and saving for retirement. That’s just what the average adult life is now.