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News
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The Onion should totally buy it.
As much as I love them, I'd love to see it keep the same tone to attract the crazy conspiracy-theorists, then poison their minds with factual information presented as if it was deep-state conspiracy revealing secret knowledge.
Oh that would be fun. Slowly shifting it from “elite globalists represented by the democrats are transing your kids and faking school shootings” to “elite billionaires represented by the republicans are poisoning your water and busting your union”
They're making islands the size of continents out of trash!
They made a chemical that will prevent Covid in most cases, and Corporations are trying to keep from paying for it!
When was the last time you had to pull over because of all the bugs hitting your windshield? They're killing all the insects just so they can have your money!
They’re banning abortion to force your children to serve them!
They’re telling you immigrants are stealing your job, but unless that immigrant is Mr Roboto then they aren’t the one you’re actually being replaced with!
They’re angering your sons and pushing them content designed to brainwash them into Nazis! You heard me, honest to god Nazis! And that’s what your sons will be if you let them keep using the media to speak to them! rips shirt off and turns an uncomfortable shade of red