(Saw some random Internet post a while ago about a guy who wouldn’t stop harassing his “friend”)

Seriously, people kept saying that “people of the opposite gender can’t be friends”, and for the specific example I saw, if a woman posts about being friends with a guy while she has a boyfriend, and something happens with her and the guy friend that’s she didn’t ask for, apparently it was her fault and “she asked for it” and she also cheated on her boyfriend??

And people say they feel bad for the boyfriend and that the guy did nothing wrong for having an innocent crush on her if he pressures her into sex/a relationship? It’s always the woman’s fault. “Obviously, women can’t even talk to men besides their boyfriend, totally!”

So… can gay men with boyfriends not have man friends? Straight men and lesbians can’t have woman friends?

A similar thing actually happened to me, a woman, with a guy friend, and I’m dating a WOMAN. (I wasn’t dating anyone at the time, but the guy still didn’t care about how I felt. Even if he said he did and was always like “with your consent, of course”, I knew he didn’t care about who I was as a person or my consent. He just wanted to guilt-trip and pressure me into being his girlfriend because that’s all I was to him: some hot lady who was evil for saying no.

(Of course, this goes for anyone, and everyone can be friends with everyone regardless of gender, this just specifically talks about women because that’s what happened in the post.)

my family is always fighting and everyone instantly starts yelling. If someone outside saw it theyd think we're unhinged. it is horrible, we get along most of the time but sometimes something flares up and it makes my stomach turn. i try and get everyone to be calm and accept what the others are saying and respect them but then theyre just stubborn and agitate me to the point i lose it myself. what do?

My sister Lena is 14. She has this one “friend” who is very odd from what I’ve seen? She’s known for being rude to almost anyone who isn’t popular at her school and yells at Lena for stupid crap.

She tells Lena she’s horrible at everything, talks behind her back, says she can’t be in her friend group, then says she’s “joking”.

Whenever something happens to anger the friend, she blames Lena and when she gets punished, she seems to have the mindset of “If I’m going down, Lena is going down with me.”

Lena came to the U.S. with our family when she was nine, so this friend is also very focused on her being foreign and won’t stop talking about her being white for some reason?

From what I know and have seen from this girl coming over sometimes, she finds random things to discriminate people for and also “almost” says the N-word (You “ni.. ninja!) against dark-skinned people or the K-word (“kite” instead of…) against Jewish people to “be funny”.

Lena’s other friend who came over one day also told me that the friend was discriminatory, finding random reasons to insult someone (even them because they’re neurodivergent), and that they were having problems with her.

I’m helping Lena figure it out. Lena doesn’t hang out with this girl for now, but I still gotta rant. Why are people even like this?

no, my girlfriend is NOT responsible for genocide. she is not a terrorist just because her mom happens to be arab.

she was born in POLAND, her father’s country, and then moved to the us at 5. either way, no control over what other governments were doing.

even as a citizen in poland/the us, she was not working for the government, and at 5, was a just a child.

and her speaking arabic with her mother is not because she’s a spy. she’s a normal woman trying to live a normal life.

in fact, my paternal grandmother is from cuba. is everyone from my dad’s/grandma’s side of the family communist now?!

lots of people type similar. in fact, many people type in all lowercase such as myself. you don’t know who someone is behind the screen. you don’t know someone’s identity from their typing style.

why do you think No Stupid Questions exists in the first place?? why do you think people ask for help/advice?? if they’re not going around saying rude/absurd crap or anything to get a reaction, it could just be someone with a weird question.

just because someone types similar to someone who was a troll or bad person does not mean that it’s their alt or that they are the same person.

i see this a lot with people assuming that account c is an alt account because account c and account a agree and disagree with account b, or because account b said something rude to account a and account c explained/defended account a. yeah, people can agree on something without being the same person.

if your comment gets -3 votes, it’s unlikely that 3 alts downvoted you, you just said something people disagree with.

I swear, 2/3 of the account blocks I make on Lemmy end up originating from posts to this sub, by accounts typically less than a week or two old. It's like, get a job.

Obviously, not everyone is like this, if you’re not like this, I don’t mean you.

You can hate the Russian government or the culture or whatever, but you shouldn’t hate people. You shouldn’t hate people of Russian descent just because of where they came from, because of the language they speak, because of what the russian government is doing.

(Idk if this is a rant, i need to talk about it though)

I get attached to my friends easily, unfortunately 😓

I have a lot of anxiety and I usually feel like I need to be online and chatting with them.

I develop a fixation with a specific person that can last from a week to several months

Sometimes I feel like I have to avoid them or be irritated with them for some reason, but I think I'm more irritated with myself.

This feeling is different from a falling in love

Very similar to a falling in love, my day becomes much better and I become more energetic when I see them but without the anxious feelings and I don't want to go out with them.

But I think I can act quite normal with them and since I'm in love, I don't feel attached to any of my friends.

my friend always thinks she's better than everyone at everything. no matter what i do, I'm useless and horrible at everything to her, and she ditches me because I'm nerdy and not the most popular and because I don't like sports. she hangs out with the popular girls and talks about me to them and why they should exclude me if I ask to hang out with them.

most of the time, though, she's nice. it's only usually in gym class, but it's been happening a lot lately.

she's usually nice to me and hangs out regardless of sports or my social status, but like I said, she's been really rude lately.

she also pushes me and tells me to get out of her face but then says it's "just a joke"...

(I was gonna put this on an LGBT community but I can’t find one I’m looking for that’s just for talking)

Okay, that’s good for you that you thought you only liked women until you met your boyfriend, but that doesn’t mean that some man is gonna magically make me like men more.

I say I’m bi/perhaps omni because there are men I would still date, and they’re sorta like exceptions for me. But if not, I’d say I was a lesbian. Anyway, there was a period where I did think I might have been a lesbian.

Whenever the topic comes up/I mention it for whatever reason, maybe for advice, whatever, I tell my friend, and they say something like “Oh, I used to think I only liked girls too until I met my handsome boyfriend ❤️”

And: “Maybe one day a man will change your life and point of view just like a man changed mine <33”

I’m happy for you and your BF, and I’m glad that you figured out you liked men too. I’m happy it worked for you, but like I said, some people aren’t attracted to men. A man isn’t going to “fix them” or “change their life”.

I don’t need a man to make me realize that I really like guys all along or anything. I get that some people are just trying to relate to the situation and that’s fine, but I’ve gotten this response a lot and needed to rant a little.

Apologies for more trump stuff on your feed, this hurt me personally.

I was born in Alaska, and I have never heard a single person there call it mckinley, despite the vast majority of my time there having been before it was "officially" recognized as Denali.

Now this rat bastard wants to change it, despite people calling it Denali long before any name was written down for the mountain. His greed is serving to lessen our culture in the popular eye.

ARGH

Back in 2022, I was obsessed with anime. I forgot who, but I definitely had an anime character as my PFP on Discord.

Anyway, someone with an anime PFP sent me a friend request with an invite to a server. “You like anime, wanna join our server?”

The server appeared to be a casual discussion server ages 13+ mainly about anime, gaming, and Western animation. It was also a place to “make online friends”.

The server used a lot of pink emojis, such as saying in their about section, “💖🌸This is a safe place, tell us anything and we won’t judge!💓💝”

The mods were also 15 (youngest) to 24 (oldest), so keep that in mind, and was mostly moderated by guys from what I remember.

In 2022, I also happened to be quite depressed (but I am much better). When one of the mods asked how I was, I told him I was a bit sad but it was fine.

However, this mod insisted it was not fine and kept spamming my DMs, begging me to tell him what was wrong.

He said he would give me advice if I told him. So all I said is, “I kinda miss my friend :/ I haven’t seen them in a while, I hope they’re ok.” (That was the truth).

He responded with “Erm, why tf would u tell me this 😑?”

Of course, I thought he was joking. This mod also flirted with me a lot, (he said he was my husband/bf) so during those exchanges, he appeared to have edited the profile pictures so that it looked like I flirted with him and that he was the one uncomfortable.

He told his server I harassed him. He also completely fabricated messages and put my profile picture on them so that it looked like I said things that I didn’t. He and the other mods all made fun of me for being mentally ill, too.

Apparently I “trauma dumped, harassed, and bullied him”. Of course, the mods believed him over me because they knew him and were his friends.

They would send voicemails of themselves laughing at my old (and new) messages, saying I was “pathetic scum”.

They then all went on a group call and told me to join. Anxious, I did. They were all laughing hysterically, saying I should do bad things to myself so they could “hear my shrieks”. I left, they banned me from their server, and I blocked every one of those assholes.

These people suck, I genuinely hope that one day, their friends are rude to them so that they know the damage they did. I know it was online, but what the hell?

And to the mods 18 and older, you all are grown adults acting like this. ADULTS. You condone children being like this (15 yr old mod) and you also think it’s okay to be an adult and act this way.

Tried creating another Reddit account with a different phone number. I got banned. I did NOTHING.

Damn mods don’t even tell you why you got shadowbanned? Honestly, what a stupid fucking site ISTFG. I. Did. Nothing. Wrong.

Are these Reddit mods on crack? What the hell.

I had a girlfriend who was usually quite nice, but she mostly had internalized homophobia, thought she was better than everyone else and "one of the good ones".

when someone says “i’m not homophobic, i have an lgbt friend”, she was the friend in question.

anyway, at least we broke up, because she was seeing a guy behind my back, leaving my texts on read, and seeing him? so i think she cheated, even tho she “apologized”.

she also seemed edgy and “hated” everything. yeahhhhh…

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/post/20942690

Decided that Rant may be a better place for it.

(First off, I just got banned for viewing the same posts with multiple accounts)

I frequented the AITA posts and the advice posts, and I saw one from a teenage girl.

She has a boyfriend, and her male friend wouldn’t leave her alone as he was obsessed with her.

She kept telling him no and wanted to be just friends with him, until she had to block him.

The comments were outrageous. Some were saying stuff like “good on you for blocking him. you’re not responsible for his feelings, nta”.

however, some people were calling her a whore, saying she was seeking validation from other men, that men and women couldn’t be friends.

I have no idea where they’re drawing this conclusion. I know many women who have male friends with nothing between them.

And it’s completely plausible for a male friend to have feelings. She can’t control his feelings. She didn’t start dating/making out with him and clearly wasn’t interested in him, so she didn’t cheat.

they also said she was asking for him to be attracted to her, that it was her fault, etc.

They were even saying that the girl was terrible and that the guy was “NTA, not even a little” because he just had a “harmless crush and couldn’t control his feelings” even though he literally asked her to cheat on her bf and guilt-tripped her right before she blocked him?

This feels kind of gross, poor OP was 15 when she made the post :/

(I don’t need advice, I’m already broken up with her, so I’m kinda just ranting).

Of course, everyone has had that one (or more) crazy/bad ex. As a bi girl, mine was with Rosalie, who I dated around two years ago, so I’m already much broken up with her.

We don’t talk much anymore, but Rosalie seems pretty nice now and I think she’s getting help, thankfully.

When we first met, Rosalie and I were friends. Eventually, she started to continuously joke-flirt with me, and I would flirt back.

Due to the attention she gave me, I started to actually catch feelings for her.

After a while, Rosalie confessed that she had genuine feelings for me and asked if I’d like to go out with her.

I, of course, said yes, and that I liked her too.

The relationship started out in the “honeymoon stage” where we were pretty nice and flirty to each other, but she got more distant as the relationship went on.

She started becoming really dry with her texts and spending more time with her friends than with me. Then, it was her other partner Kate (since we were in an open relationship). However, she also had a crush at school: Ben.

She also apparently hit Ben and gave him a black eye because “she loved him” and stuff like that (which I found out after I found out she was rude) so I probably shouldn’t be surprised.

Anyway, Rosalie always acted really upset with everything, but when I’d ask why, she’d say she was fine.

I gave her some space for a little while, checking on her occasionally.

Rosalie started to go from depressed to passive-aggressive and rude.

This worried me, so I spent as much time away from her as I could. Sometimes, she would be outwardly rude, like calling me a disgusting creep and told me to “shut up”. I stopped talking to her.

On public servers to her online friends, she would even talk behind my back when she apparently thought I wasn’t in the server.

In servers where she was a mod, she would specifically report/delete all my posts for no reason.

It wasn’t so much that I was mad at her being upset, but how she was acting towards me for it. I understood that she had a lot of mental issues, as well as an abusive family. That, I felt bad for, but it didn’t really give her the right to be rude towards me.

Rosalie would switch a lot, though. Sometimes, she would be sweet as can be, telling everyone about her “amazing” partner, who she loved very much. She would tell jokes to me. She would flirt with me, say she loved me. Expressed affection a lot, before going right back to how she was before.

Every bad thing that happened, she got mad at me for and blamed me for it. She would blow things completely out of proportion and believed that everyone was trying to attack her.

Upset at her rude behavior, I would vent about her to my friend Ana and ask her for advice.

After some time passed, I was still going without contact with Rosalie, so I asked the girl who was either her online friend or older sister how she was doing. She told me Rosalie was okay, but was probably going through stuff.

Rosalie then confronted me and told me she knew I was talking bad about her behind her back, and that made me a horrible partner, even though all I asked was if she was okay. I didn’t want to ask her herself for obvious reasons, especially when she told me not to talk to her because I was disgusting.

We were together for nine months. Kate and Rosalie lied that I abused them in every way (disgusting), so I went fully without contact and left every server and group chat after that.

After a while, Rosalie and Kate both apologized and told me they were getting help and that they were in a really bad mental state, and that “2022 was not their year”.

I rejoined a group chat of theirs, which had old chats saying that my being autistic was weird, that I made everyone uncomfortable, and that Rosalie probably dated a creep, etc.

However, I excused this since they posted that around five months ago and never brought it up again.

They welcomed me with open arms and said they missed me, and that they said that because they were very petty 13 & 14-year-olds, but they were never mad at me now.

Rosalie, now 16, I talk to occasionally, and she seems to be getting better. Kate, also now 16, seems to be getting better too, and she’s my girlfriend now. I decided to give her another try since Rosalie did most of it and Kate just tagged along. Both seem really sorry, but I’m ranting about it just to share, and see if anyone else has similar stories.

My BF Jay hardly ever responds to my texts anymore (we are long distance, sadly). He hardly ever expresses affection for me, and our relationship feels more platonic.

He has a list of people who he's grateful for and people he appreciates, etc. I'm never on there, since he always "forgets". I don't want him to feel obligated to, though, so I've learned to ignore it.

He doesn't mention me to anyone, though I excused it as him being private.

He speaks romantically about other girls but not me, as if I'm just his best friend. Eventually, I found on some posts and on his bio that he's been with two girls he didn't tell me about, while simultaneously dating me.

Now, we are in an open relationship, but the deal was we could only date if either of us knew about it. I did not. He's apparently been with these girls for months.

He broke up with Mae, who he dated without my knowledge, then dated Sara. He talks a little about Sara to me now sometimes, but now he says Sara is just his friend.

Not only did he not tell me about either girl, but he, of course, never mentioned me to them, and proceeded to ask them out as if he was single.

IDK how to feel anymore...

Edit: We talked it out :)

Some people, of course, answer questions respectfully, which I’m grateful about. However, there are many people who just respond with stuff like “What a stupid question. I hope you die you fat bitch. Of course it’s people like you who ask stupid questions like this. You don’t know anything, shut up and die.”

If you ask anything about politics, for example, someone will say something like “I hope you die, liberal. You don’t know anything about politics, stop assuming shit you fat bitch. Liberals are stupid and so are you.”

Answers like these aren’t at ALL relevant to the question, a lot of them who say not to assume things are ironically assuming things about the person who asked. I’ve also noticed that a lot of people with such responses often have the most responses and show up as people to ask on that topic, as well as a few of them having on their bio “I’m so smart”. Sure, but your responses do not make you sound that way.

Don’t get me wrong, not everyone is like this, and I will get a respectful response or two, but 80% of the answers are stuff like this. I’ve seen quite a few responses from these assholes saying that women are the Devil’s spawn and whatnot, so I’m gonna assume these are trolls, but when they make up so much of the responses, it’s annoying as hell.

And no, people on Quora, I’m not just upset with people who disagree with me. The problem isn’t that they disagree, it’s that they’re being assholes.

My friend Abby texted the group chat one day. She said that our friend Ella's mom texted Abby and told her that Ella passed out and still hasn’t woken up.

Of course, for hours, we were worried sick about her. Abby told us she hasn’t received any more news about Ella. I vented to my family about it, and they said they were sorry that happened to Ella and I’d just have to wait and see if she gets better.

Ella also has a boyfriend, Michael. Michael and I eventually found out from Ella that it was a prank, and she had just turned her phone off. I was worried about her, and Michael was pissed to find out that she did that.

Ella thought it wouldn’t get a reaction, so she did that because she was bored and didn’t know what to do.

I'm not sure where to put this. Just... it worried me so badly, since Ella's a friend and I care about her. Why would someone even do this?

We have a president that continued it's reign for three terms in a nation that can only run for two, effectively acted as president for six terms (prime minister and president with executive power), essentially rigged an election where the majority believed that he would lose, and people just don't pay it any mind! He's gonna run again! It's not legal it's not but fuck you!

Invade Syria, fuck up Kurds, inflate the economy, fuck everyone except the military because god knows only they have the power left to oust him so let's appease them

Hate crimes aren't even fucking illegal, they pull it under the rug

It's over. Even expats that came for the cheap land are leaving. Land is fucking cheap and yet no one owns any land too, no job opportunities in my city, I fucking hate this place, I wanna go abroad man see real civilisation

Oh, I have to play private for six months before I even do that, forced enlistment hahahaha

Just got a prepaid SIM card that came with 10GB of data. I thought I was deactivating automatic renewal, no. It just fucking deactivated it completely and removed all remaining data immediately.

Aaah...

T-Mobile prices that at 349 CZK - 14.34 USD.

Why is that even an option?

I hate accidentally clicking on that website on search results. What kind of deranged website translates code??? It ignores the browser language setting and translates based on ip, and it keeps happening even if you click turn off translate for this website. Aaaargh

It may be too early to call, but to me it's looking like democrats are going to be losing for a long long time if leftists are stuck moronically fighting each other over invented strawmen. Honestly the interaction was so bizarre and nonsensical and polarized I have to wonder if the comm is an organized effort to disrupt leftists.

I think reasonably, the destruction of Palestine and its people has been weighing so heavily on me. Every time I have to buy something or get a paycheck I think about where that tax money is going and what a coward I am for not doing more than joining protests when they are nearby. I used to think the Vietnam protesters or the germans that hid their neighbors or the volunteers of the underground railroad network were such brave rebels but I’m starting to think they felt this same deep hopelessness at how small their power was in the face of state sanctioned genocide. I’m so upset at the lack of basic humanity in our lawmakers worldwide, the complacency of the US population in the face of an ethnic cleansing, and the continued dishonesty and corruption of the media. It seems so ridiculous and tragic to enjoy a basketball game or window shopping in the midst of this.

I understand that effective journalism costs money to produce, proficient journalists should get and will go where they are paid, and sites need funds to maintain their operations. All that makes sense. However, I don't read one website I use Lemmy and internet searches to find news I'm interested in reading. I maybe go to the same paywalled news site twice a week at most, but rarely if ever quarce a month. It would make no sense for me to have a subscription to any paywalled news site even if I wanted to spend money. I have no option other than to use proxies, assume the article from others' comments, or just read the title.

The internet news media system sucks, but I don't see a solution.