A SUPA TRUE STORY
A mild-mannered doctor is trained in the art of ass-kicking by a no-nonsense ghetto kid in an effort to regain a family heirloom from Uganda's toughest gang.
HALF-MAN, HALF-MONSTER!
An American journalist stationed in Japan is given a mysterious injection by a mad scientist, turning him into a homicidal, two-headed monster.
IT STARTED AS A GAME. CAMPERS AGAINST COUNSELORS. IT TURNED INTO A NIGHTMARE, THAT BECAME A REVOLUTION.
A teen counselor at a boys camp leads the overthrow of its strict director and also the takeover of a nearby girls camp.
Found this review from Forces of Geek in my newsfeed, thought it might be of interest to folks here.
Cinema Bizarro is a very good book about (mostly) bad movies.
The fact that such all-time turkeys as Robot Monster and The Navy vs. the Night Monsters are treated with an equal level of respect to such genuine genre classics as Invasion of the Body Snatchers and The Blob says a lot about the mindset of these reviews.
A book for kids covering everything from 7 Faces of Dr Lao to Woman Eater!
Publisher's link:
THE THIRD ENTRY IN THE RONDO AWARD NOMINATED MONSTER MOVIE BOOK SERIES!
From the creators of Giant Bug Cinema - A Monster Kid’s Guide and Giant Beast Cinema - A Monstrous Movie Guide, both of which reached the Top Ten on Amazon for Horror Movie Books, comes Cinema Bizarro — a celebration of killer plants, eccentric aliens, and weird westerns!
Featuring insanely insightful reviews of 38 movies (plus 30 capsule reviews of Weird Westerns of the 1930’s and 1940’s), take a very unsafe tourbus through a terrifying terrain filled with sight-stealing triffids, alien gorillas in diving helmets, and the vampires ’n’ dinosaurs that vexed the wild west. Let Cinema Bizarro envelop you in its loving embrace like the cool, slimy clutches of The Blob!
The contributors are:
• Larry Blamire - Rondo-Award winning film historian and cult filmmaker of Sony’s The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra, Giant Beast Cinema
• Dan Madigan - former Writer for WWE, screenwriter/creator of See No Evil franchise.
• Tracy Mercer - Giant Beast Cinema, Host, My Favorite Shtty Movie podcast
• Mike Peros - José Ferrer: Success and Survival, Dan Duryea: Heel with a Heart, Giant Beast Cinema, film critic for Noho Arts District
• Steven Peros - Co-Editor/Contributor to Giant Beast Cinema, screenwriter of Peter Bogdanovich’s The Cat’s Meow
• Nadia Robertson - Cinema Macabre Magazine, Rock and Roll Nightmares, and Co-Host of Cinema Chats podcast
• Brian R. Solomon - Godzilla FAQ, Giant Beast Cinema
• Phoef Sutton - Two-time Emmy winning writer for Cheers, co-host of Films Freaks Forever podcast.
• Mark Bailey - Conceived, designed, and co-edited entire monster book trilogy.
• Steven B. Orkin - Copy editor for monster book trilogy, Winner of Stephen King’s On Writing contest
A LAND WHERE TIME STANDS STILL AND THE EXOTIC ACTION NEVER STOPS...
Action-movie star Tony Markham finds himself transported back in time to Dinosaur Valley. Now trapped in a world of dangerous dinosaurs, grunting cavemen and a tribe of exotic, love-starved cavegirls, Tony must put his modern-days skills to the test in order to survive prehistoric perils, win the cavegirl of his dreams and (maybe) return to his own time?
A SAVAGE ORGY OF BLOOD AND LUST!
On a tranquil island, vacationers face relentless torment from a sadistic biker gang. The situation turns deadly when one of the bikers gets killed.
Loads of people have thought "What if you had a time machine? Would you go back and kill Hitler?"
The Yesterday Machine addresses the question "What if you had a time machine and were a mad Nazi scientist? Would you go back and save Hitler? And bring him to present-day America?" (Hmmm....)
Apparently a cheapo "regional movie" made in Dallas and never distributed beyond the Texas drive-in circuit, its release is so shrouded in uncertainty that no one can quite agree on the year it first came out. (Suggestions include 1963, 1965 and 1966. Still filling out the bill in Texas drive-ins in the mid 70s.)
It opens with a completely gratuitous bit of majorette go-go dancing, and pans to also view... a knockoff Charles Napier. At which point I went "And this movie is gonna have Nazis... is this a RUSS MEYER MOVIE???"
But as the titles roll, it becomes clear this is by a completely different director. Russ Marker. See, 3 whole letters different from Russ Meyer!
We also know it's not the œuvre of the world's favourite Nazi-obsessed director by the fact that the majorette and other actresses lack Meyer's trademark... topheaviness. And the film is not nearly gonzo enough. It's a fairly action-free hour before the Nazis even show up, at which point the mad scientist spends like 15-20 minutes just explaining his time travel "science" in front of a blackboard. I genuinely dozed off at this point. (But presumably at the drive-in, this would be when the teens would be rounding third base, so... who cares?)
A literal snooze fest. Don't bother watching... once the go-go dancing is over.
Not Charles Napier, in a movie by not Russ Meyer
Info:
Teaser:
Movie (apparently it's in the public domain now, so it's everywhere):
THEY TAKE WAR TO A NEW DIMENSION.
During World War II, a group of American soldiers gets trapped behind enemy lines in Italy. They encounter an alien spaceship and its surviving passenger, leading to a pursuit involving both Nazi forces and additional extraterrestrial entities aiming to rescue their comrade.
SHE'S SO HOT, YOU'LL NEED TO CALL 911
In order to win the 'Centerfold of the Year' competition, Angel uses a serum developed by a mad scientist that will make her even more beautiful. She is so eager to win, however, that she accidentally overdoses on the substance and grows over 60 feet tall.
TRAILER [Slightly NFSW]
Forbidden Planet (1956) is the movie for this Sunday's "monsterdon" watch party over on Mastodon, our fediverse sibling!
How to watch the movie:
this landmark film is considered one of the great science fiction films of the 1950s,[4] a precursor of contemporary science fiction cinema.
...
Forbidden Planet's effects team was nominated for the Academy Award for Best Special Effects at the 29th Academy Awards. Tony Magistrale describes it as one of the best examples of early techno-horror.[10] In 2013, the film was selected for preservation in the United States National Film Registry by the Library of Congress as being "culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant".
...
At the review aggregator website Rotten Tomatoes, the film holds a rating of 94% based on 51 reviews from critics, averaging 8.20/10.[25] Bosley Crowther of The New York Times wrote that everyone who worked on the film certainly "had a barrel of fun with it. And, if you've got an ounce of taste for crazy humor, you'll have a barrel of fun, too."[26] Variety wrote: "Imaginative gadgets galore, plus plenty of suspense and thrills, make the Nicholas Nayfack production a top offering in the space travel category."
FROM DEEP SPACE, AN ARMY OF MAN-EATING TERROR!
Brought back from a doomed space mission, an army of giant rats develop a big appetite for Los Angeles residents.
THEY TAMPERED WITH NATURE -- NOW THEY MUST PAY THE PRICE...
A cop chases two hippies suspected of a series of Manson family-like murders; unbeknownst to him, the real culprits are the living dead, brought back to life by an experimental ultra-sonic radiation machine used by the Ministry of Agriculture to kill insects.
THE ADULT PUPPET MOVIE WITH SOMETHING TO OFFEND EVERYBODY!
'The Feebles' is a major Bletch the Walrus variety show. Its cast includes a heroin-addicted frog, a rat trying to make adult movies, a manic-depressive elephant and a rabbit with AIDS. When Bletch's girlfriend and star of the show, Heidi the Hippo, discovers that her husband is cheating on her, she takes matters into her own hands.
Beyond Atlantis (1973) is the movie for this Sunday's "monsterdon" watch party over on Mastodon, our fediverse sibling!
How to watch the movie:
A band of adventurers invade a native island determined to grab a reported fortune in buried treasure. The islanders are just as determined to keep their sacred treasure. Complications ensue.
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0069783/
The film did not do well financially, something that Ashley chiefly attributed to the PG rating. "Had we done it a little harder it probably would have done better", said Ashley later. "At least we'd have had a picture that was a little more exploitable."[9] He also thought that the extensive underwater footage slowed down the action, saying, "It's gorgeous. But watching it is like watching slow motion."
..A BUILDING-BOUNDING BEAUTY ..WITH SUPERHUMAN STRENGTH ..AND AN EROTIC APPETITE TO MATCH
A socially-awkward young woman gets bitten by a radioactive spider and becomes a crime-fighting superhero. This Spiderbabe tries to defeat a nefarious super villain, and also goes after any man (or woman) she wants to bed down with.
Stumbled across the DDF: Reel Films channel on YouTube, which has a bunch of full movies that are apparently properly licensed.
After seeing Brett Harrelson (brother of Woody) in Inferno, I went with another desert action film with less famous / successful / good relations of someone famous. And it's a twofer! With John Belushi's brother James being intentionally odious as the bad guy and... Roger Clinton! Yes, look out for an early cameo from the half-brother of the then-serving President of the actual United States!
Plus, this is also a sci-fi timey-wimey flick (but don't worry, no technobabble) in the vein of Cause and Effect and Groundhog Day, and c/tenforward has been loopy for time loops lately.
Director
Starring
Geoff Andrew of Time Out wrote:
With its explosive action, black comedy and far-fetched sci-fi imposed on an otherwise vaguely plausible crime thriller, this modest indie film is reminiscent of such low budget '80s exploiters as Tremors and the work of Charles Band. Like the most memorable of these, it's lifted out of the rut by a quirky, imaginative script. True, Belushi's performance is overbearing and M. Emmet Walsh turns in yet another sweaty cameo; true, too, that the frequent visual emphasis on Travis' cleavage flags the movie's compromised ambitions. Nevertheless, there's more than enough energy, bravado and invention to engage the attention throughout.
I enjoyed it but then I'm a sucker for 90s action flicks.
Everyone knows about Bruceploitation, that wave of martial art films starring Bruce Lee lookalikes with names like Bruce Li/Le/Lai etc.
But did you know about Bronsploitation? Action movies starring people who look like Charles Bronson. Director Mike Malloy has made a documentary about three Bronson-lookalikes who went into the movies:
Article:
Trailer:
I didn't know about Bronsploitation before, but given that he was the biggest movie star in the world for a while, it seems only logical that there were producers trying to cash in using lookalikes. In fact, full disclosure :D, I had a distant cousin who looked like Bronson and used to make some extra money in the 70s and 80s doing things like opening supermarkets!
I never would have guessed that Bronsploitation would still be a thing in the 2020s, though!
A more in-depth article on Bronzi:
Bronzi fares better in Once Upon a Time in Deadwood, the best of the Bronzi/Perez collaborations. The production values are still abysmal, with nearly every actor looking like they’re participating in a hastily organized Wild West re-enactment, but the story is more substantial, and Paré brings charisma to his role as the villain. The movie piggybacks on both Bronson Westerns and the HBO series Deadwood, with most of the action set in the Dakota Territory town of Deadwood, where Paré plays a local kingpin named Swearengen.
Obviously, Paré is no Ian McShane, and Perez is no David Milch. The dialogue and acting are mostly stiff and awkward, and Bronzi comes up against the limits of his range when he’s called upon to express pain and anguish. He’s a remarkably inexpressive actor, and it doesn’t help that Perez insists on having someone else dub his lines, to cover for Bronzi’s thick Hungarian accent. In From Hell to the Wild West, that voice comes closest to sounding like Bronson, and in other Perez movies it just sounds like a bored voiceover artist in a recording booth.
Trailer for Once Upon a Time in Deadwood:
And this line :D
Bronzi’s latest film, Escape From Death Block 13, is his first without Perez, and it’s easily the most movie-like movie he’s ever starred in.
Trailer for Escape From Death Block 13:
Horror starring Robert Bronzi and Steven Berkoff
Trailer:
Full movie (uploader claims to be the official channel for Uncork'd Entertainment, so I think it's legit):
Martials arts Western starring Bobby Kim and Bill 'Superfoot' Wallace
Trailer:
Full movie (uploader claims all their movies are licensed and copyright-compliant; they also have the great Dolph Lundgren actioner Joshua Tree. If you haven't seen it, check it out!):
ALIVE WITH THRILLS THAT STARTED A MILLION YEARS AGO!
On a Caribbean island, a construction crew using dynamite accidentally disrupt a frozen area underneath the water. Located in the explosion rubble are two perfectly-preserved dinosaurs, as well as a Neanderthal man. The prehistoric beings come to life and are unleashed on the unsuspecting population.
Slugs (1988) is the movie for this Sunday's "monsterdon" watch party over on Mastodon, our fediverse sibling!
How to watch the movie:
English-language Spanish natural horror film ... tells the story of a small town whose locals are terrorised by aggressive carnivorous slugs.
...
On review aggregator Rotten Tomatoes, the film holds a 38% approval rating based on 8 reviews.[1]Variety praised the "convincing special effects and make-up and snappy direction" and said it "has enough thrills and spills in it to keep youth audiences alert".
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slugs_(1988_film)
We previously posted about this movie twice here on bmoviebonanza!
...SOFT ...SWEET ...SATISFYING
After the mysterious death of erotic-film actress Alta while in the company of sleazy producer Max, her manipulative agent Camilla begins searching for a 'perfect replacement'. After discovering aspiring actress, Julie, Camilla and Max slowly groom her into a mirror image of Alta. As Julie begins to become aware of the sinister motives of her new caretakers, she also starts fearing for her life.
GRINDHOUSE TRAILER (NSFW)
EXPECT NO MERCY
When a four-man terrorist group known as Team Phantom starts raising havoc in downtown Tokyo, the city is in desperate need of a hero. An unexpected champion appears in the form of Lady Battle Cop, a former female tennis champion who has been transformed into a seemingly unstoppable cyborg.
ON THE LOOSE... AND HE'S HUNGRY
A zoo veterinarian gets caught up in a grisly adventure as she finds herself leading the city-wide hunt for a monstrous lion terrorizing the Dutch capital of Amsterdam.
The Gate (1987) is the movie for this Sunday's "monsterdon" watch party over on Mastodon, our fediverse sibling!
How to watch the movie:
The film follows two young boys who accidentally release a horde of demons from their backyard through a large hole in the ground.
...
Michael Wilmington of the Los Angeles Times, in comparing it to the works of Steven Spielberg and Stephen King, wrote, "whatever minor triumphs it dredges up, is too hopelessly copycat".[11] In rating it 3/5 stars, TV Guide called it a "surprisingly effective" and refreshingly uncynical horror film that may be too wimpy for some horror fans.[2] Commenting on the film's dreamlike plot, Time Out said it could have been a cult film had the filmmakers abandoned their attempts to tie together the bizarre elements.[12]In a retrospective review, Odie Henderson of Slant Magazine wrote, "If you can get in touch with your inner 12-year-old, The Gate is a pleasant diversion." Henderson identifies family values as a core theme, though it is subtle enough not to be preachy.[13] Reviewing the DVD for Dread Central, Paul Nicholasi rated it 4.5/5 stars and called it "a MUST HAVE movie for all horror fans" that they can show their kids to introduce them to horror films.
A place for lovers of B movies to come together and talk about them.
Rules: