4
submitted 1 year ago by nei7jc@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml
top 13 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[-] Bear@rammy.site 36 points 1 year ago

I am, in fact, not a real bear.

[-] the_boxhead@sh.itjust.works 17 points 1 year ago

Umm, that’s what a real bear would say…

[-] Bear@rammy.site 4 points 1 year ago

I am five totally harmless raccoons wearing a bearskin rug. It's fine.

[-] DestroyMegacorps@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 year ago
[-] Emperor@feddit.uk 10 points 1 year ago

I don't really have one but I feel like I should. I'll work on this and get back to you.

[-] nei7jc@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago

"I'm killing my roommate, brb"

[-] Pudutr0n@feddit.cl 9 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

The only reason people consider me so generous and giving is because I overcompensate due to looking at myself, seeing a vast abyss of selfish egomaniacal narcissism, and being too vain to accept people seeing me that way as well.

This is also the root cause for the insane amounts of self loathing I deal with.

So there ya go.

[-] Saigonauticon@voltage.vn 7 points 1 year ago

I am a level 15 lawful-evil bureaucrat.

If it is possible at all to fill and file a form correctly, I will do so efficiently, without error, and with misplaced joy. Even if it's longer than my thesis. This is automatic and no dice roll is required. The receiving organization has to make a willpower check else approve the form without reading it in it's entirety.

Once per tax reporting period as defined by my company license (unless my company license is updated to change my legal address, in that case, the longer of the two possibilities), I can pass any standardized exam, on any topic, without study, or even knowledge of the language it's written in.

Additionally, twice a day (holidays excluded, except labor day, and Saturdays only before noon), I can rubber stamp any form using only the power of my mind and a rubber stamp.

[-] LinkMiguel@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

are you trying to start a "we all have secrets" thread in lemmy "anonymously"

[-] nei7jc@lemmy.world 0 points 1 year ago

I'll let you figure that one out

[-] Oyster_Lust@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago

I killed a man in Reno, just to watch him die.

[-] Antimutt@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

I chuckle at people who can't understand the short story hidden in my Lemmy mugshot.

[-] trimmerfrost@lemm.ee -1 points 1 year ago

I dunno why it got downvoted

load more comments
view more: next ›
this post was submitted on 27 Jul 2023
4 points (55.9% liked)

Asklemmy

43728 readers
1456 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy 🔍

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

  1. Open-ended question
  2. Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
  3. Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
  4. Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
  5. An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~

founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS