and NixOS would be?

So if I'm using one of those single cup keurig-like machines that don't actually use cups, I'm a Mint user?

I'm a Fedora user, but it I do the pour over method as seen by the Arch (btw) user.

Too short of a list. Needs to be expanded.

I can think about cold brew, italian coffee maker and traditional moroccan style (unfit for those weak of heart).

linux mint?

I make overnight coldbrew in a mason jar. What distro is that?

Somewhat accurate. I used my last coffee machine for 10ish years, but my grandma used it another 10 before

arch user should be "is all you need so let me tell you about it for five hours straight"

People wtf, this is not stopping to spam my comments.

I get it, you like Coffee!

What about people who have an automatic espresso machine? Grinds the beans then Tampa and brews all with one button? Gotta make sure the settings are perfect. A mix on 2 and 5 I guess.

According to this I use Debian but my lack of audio, menu bar, and file browser says otherwise

As someone who's never drank coffee (yes, really), what distro should I use?

I currently daily-drive Manjaro (Plasma) with Linux Mint 20.3 (Cinnamon) installed as a trusty backup.