328
submitted 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) by mizu6079@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

Please don't ask why I need this.

It would be great if the food also made me sweat less.

It has to be something I can easily find.

EDITS FOR CLARIFICATION:

  • I am not planning on partaking in any illegal activities.

  • I do not condone the use of illegal substances and am not planning on smuggling anything anywhere.

  • I am not going on a hiking trip or mailing myself anywhere.

  • I will be staying in a tent (not a small one; a huge with with air conditioning and everything). I will be traveling for five days, returning to my current location on day 3 and traveling again on the last two days. I will not poop on the first three days (hopefully).

  • Clean toilets with all the expected facilities will be available to me. I am not going to poop for reasons that I wish to keep to myself.

  • If it gets bad, like really bad, like a-piece-of-poop-is-literally-halfway-out-my-ass bad, I will use the toilets.

Please stop asking because I am not telling anyone the reason.

(page 4) 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[-] Padit@feddit.de 1 points 2 years ago

Use anti diarrhea medication, for example Loperamide, it's available in every normal pharmacy (found it in France and Germany, no idea where you are). It will basically numb all your muscles in your gut and it will become impossible to poop.

For three days that should be fine, but you should reduce your food volume a bit.

This is unhealthy and stupid!!! But it works and is not crazy dangerous for your body.

P.S.:I guess you should just overcome your social fears and poop like a normal person.

load more comments (4 replies)
[-] troublecat@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 years ago

I'm going to tell my descendents this was the origin of the phrase "I shit you not"

[-] groggy@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

I was here when the no-shit post jump started the popularity of this platform. My children will be so proud

[-] victron@kbin.social 1 points 2 years ago

Please post again after your ordeal, OP.

[-] mizu6079@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

I won't be able to come online during or right after the three-day period but if i remember it afterwards I'll update the post with an edit

[-] match@pawb.social 1 points 2 years ago

!remindme 2 wee -- aw fuck now I'm sad

[-] swancheez@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

Dude, I know you can't say why, but I sincerely hope you come back after your...excursion? And update us all with the results. And may e tell us why when you have the chance.

Just coming in here and saying you can't shit for 3 days. What on earth is this.

[-] Cinner@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

I have the solution because I too have been in this exact situation, but you can't eat much or you'll be extremely uncomfortable.

The day before you go, drink a full bottle of magnesium citrate. This will cause liquid diarrhea and completely empty you out. This is used before Colonoscopies to give the doctor a clear view.

Then for the next 3 days eat very little while taking 3 immodium each day.

You're welcome.

[-] Mattchenzo@reddthat.com 1 points 2 years ago

Yep, this is the way.... Empty your bowels entirely with the magnesium citrate, and then use immodium and don't eat much and you will be good to go. (Good not to go, I guess!)

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] Biff@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

This is like some bizzaro 90's sitcom. "Quick, I need your help to not poop for 3 days! No time to explain!"

[-] jumperalex@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

MY POOPLE NEED ME!!!!!!

[-] JoeTheSane@vlemmy.net 1 points 2 years ago

I’m so happy I’m here!

[-] JackbyDev@programming.dev 1 points 2 years ago

Our first "5/7 with rice" story! Wow!

[-] FizzOnMyJayce@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

Update plz?

[-] baatliwala@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago
[-] Zippit@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

Take Iron supplements and eat noodles, the nissin soba classic. Also, hardboiled eggs. Backs me up every time.

[-] Leap@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

Oh my God, I have so many questions.

[-] Ladha979@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 2 years ago

Just take the dildo out for 5 minutes man, it's no big deal

[-] bahnburner@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

Breast milk has very few undigestible solids. Just saying.

load more comments
view more: ‹ prev next ›
this post was submitted on 22 Jun 2023
328 points (94.3% liked)

Asklemmy

47845 readers
984 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy 🔍

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

  1. Open-ended question
  2. Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
  3. Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
  4. Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
  5. An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~

founded 6 years ago
MODERATORS