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Almost every jar of pickles claims a serving of pickles has zero calories. Now clearly, this is incorrect and the result of exploiting some ridiculous FDA loophole, since anyone knows that cucumbers provide calories.

So let's say you're in a situation where you lose all access to food, but you've got effectively unlimited access to pickles -- like, you're trapped inside a recently abandoned pickle warehouse.

Could you conceivably eat enough pickles to survive for a month? Two months? Or would your body just shut down from all the sodium and acid?

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[-] lurch@sh.itjust.works 4 points 10 months ago

maybe eat some vitamin pills too. it's what i do, when i venture on week long junk food or preserves feasts. i also, sometimes take some minerals like magnesium, but just one pill after like 3 days or so if i think i didn't get enough. it prevents cramps to have the minerals balanced

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[-] pastaPersona@lemmy.world 4 points 10 months ago

Do different pickle varieties play into this at all? IE there’s pickles with little bits of pepper, dill, garlic etc. Those things must add some nutritional value at least

[-] MyTurtleSwimsUpsideDown@kbin.social 4 points 10 months ago

Bread and Butter pickles have sugar added, so theres calories at least

[-] numberfour002@lemmy.world 3 points 10 months ago

It would vary quite a bit depending on the person and the circumstances.

First, I'm assuming you're talking about brine pickled cucumbers based on the context, but brining isn't the only way to make pickles and cucumbers aren't the only thing you can make pickles from.

I think 2 of the biggest considerations here would be whether I have access to clean, fresh water and whether I'm in good health, with no major health issues.

If I don't have access to fresh water, then I wouldn't eat the pickles to begin with. And I would probably only have a matter of days to live.

If I had major health issues that would be potentially fatal without medical treatment, then that would probably be the limiting factor in how long I survive and would be dependent on the condition.

If I do have access to fresh water, I would give the pickles a lengthy soak (or even boil them if I could) before I ate them. That would mitigate at least some of the concerns about too much sodium. I could further mitigate some of the concerns by ensuring that I'm drinking lots of water (at least I would assume that would help somewhat).

I've read that the average person can go without any food for at least a month or two (with 3 weeks being the minimum), so if I did my sodium mitigation, then I would expect to at least survive at the upper limit of that. From a purely caloric standpoint, the average pickling cucumber (not that there really is such a thing as average/standard) is something like 20 - 50 calories each, and I feel like that alone would extend the window of survivability.

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[-] cabron_offsets@lemmy.world 3 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

No fat, no protein. You’d starve to death in a matter of weeks. Assuming you have fresh water to drink.

[-] Kapow@kbin.social 3 points 10 months ago
[-] pan_troglodytes@programming.dev 3 points 10 months ago

vinegar pickles or pickled foods? lactofermented foods are technically pickles and I've seen quite a bit of pickled meat. pickling is a food preservation method, you dont need high levels of sodium, though it certainly helps.

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[-] moon@lemmy.cafe 2 points 10 months ago

Would eating Pickle Rick be extra calories?

[-] Tatters@lemmy.world 2 points 10 months ago

Easy. If I was trapped in a recently abandoned pickle factory, then I would survive on the food in the staff canteen, starting with what had just been prepared, such as pizza and sandwiches; after a day or so I would move on to see what was in the refrigerators, and finally work my way up to the frozen food. Oh, by the way, when they abandoned the factory, they forgot to turn off the power, so all the perishables are still nicely preserved.

Also, lots of things can be pickled, not just cucumbers. The word “pickles” makes me immediately think of pickled onions. There is usually quite a bit of sugar in the picking vinegar.

[-] LinkOpensChest_wav@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 10 months ago

Yes, but imagine it's a pickle warehouse, like strictly a warehouse somewhere that houses product.

Also, I'm not sure where you live, but if a place in the US put pickled onions on your burger when you asked for pickles, I think we'd have a problem. "Pickles" without further context always means pickled cucumbers. That's even how they're labeled in supermarkets.

[-] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 2 points 10 months ago

if a place in the US put pickled onions on your burger when you asked for pickles, I think we'd have a problem

Hell nah. Pickled onion is really good on a burger. I wish it was more common.

[-] LinkOpensChest_wav@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 10 months ago

I ... I can't ... I ... am I smoking salvia?

Pickled onions may be good if you ask for it. I'm not arguing about the flavor lmao. I'm saying 100% of people who ask for "pickles" without further elaboration are expecting pickled cucumbers because that's what's meant by "pickles" here in the US. It's how they're labeled on menus, packaging including jars, advertising, literature, movies, comics, and all other forms of media.

NO ONE anywhere in the US means "pickled onions" when they say "pickles." No one.

[-] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 3 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Oh lol. I read that wrong. Yeah, that would be a problem. "Yo, where's my pickle?"

[-] LinkOpensChest_wav@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 10 months ago

I agree that pickled onions are good, though

Underappreciated condiment

[-] Tatters@lemmy.world 1 points 10 months ago

Just as well that I am not in the US then.

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this post was submitted on 12 Jan 2024
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