Ex girlfriend then...

Depends. Does she know about my wife and kids?

Pretty sure this post is a honeypot

Nothing. She has no time to read Excel spreadsheets.

She'll be confused about the situation but it's not like I have any strange files or anything, if that's what you mean

My wife and merged CD and DVD collections years ago and all our photo albums and documents (in binders) are all in the office, so I guess technically we have access to each others files... does this count?

She'd probably blush because I have a lot of pictures of her I never bothered to send her.

@original_ish_name

I'll just replace "girlfriend" with "wife" since I am married —

Nothing happens. My wife knows me well. There isn't anything I think would surprise her.

Delete System32

nothing because I am paranoid

It's all Linux isos and indie games and project files from game engines/programming languages that I got distracted from. If I had somehow convinced her that I was funny or interesting, all of that magic is now gone.

My parents would finally be proud that im not longer gay

Which girlfriend are we talking about here?

nothing much

An avalanche of boredom ensues.

Also a great disappointment in my interest in Linux memes.