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submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by cheese_greater@lemmy.world to c/shittyasklemmy@lemmy.ml
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[-] MapleEngineer@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

I think they have VoV sex.

[-] cheese_greater@lemmy.world -2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

U kidz 'n ur damn agronysms ;)

[-] terusgormand8465@lemmings.world 3 points 9 months ago

They just push them together really hard

[-] Death_Equity@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

Proficient application of controlled vaginal prolapse.

[-] cheese_greater@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

No fucking way?! For true?! Thats sort of genius

[-] Death_Equity@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago

I heard it from a lady with a Subaru. She obviously was an expert in the subject matter.

[-] cheese_greater@lemmy.world 1 points 3 months ago

Subarus are like lesbian central

[-] Death_Equity@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago

Only if their bedroom is dead. Otherwise Toyota, Honda or Telsa. Sometimes a Raptor or muscle car.

The Volvo station wagon types consider NPR and silence as foreplay for pre-gaming hate watching Twitter media of protests they "couldn't" attend to.

[-] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 year ago

First, they warm up and do stretches.

After everything is limbered up, they take position. One will do a handstand, then push up really hard while over the native vagina of the other. This causes them to dive in to the vagina.

Then the other grabs a tool called a dykorn, wedges the first ones vagina apart and slams their head in.

Now that they are engaged in foreplay, they gradually wiggle their way into each other until both vaginas are inside the other.

Then, a singularity forms, and new lesbians are formed from dark matter.

Source: used to be a beard for a nice couple that let me watch.

[-] cheese_greater@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

What do you mean by beard? I've heard this come up before several times and I have no idea what it means.

Is it filling in a celebrity's seat at public events or something?

[-] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 year ago

It's old LGB slang. And I use that shortened version of LGBTQ to illustrate how old the slang term is, not to exclude anyone

Back before gay marriage here in the US became legal, there was even less acceptance for people that weren't pure hetero. So, sometimes, folks would have a fake partner. Often, it was a lesbian and a gay man paired up to cover each other. But it could also be a friend, or even just someone hired for a specific event.

Staying in the closet at work was not too difficult, but family? That was a lot harder. So, having a boyfriend or girlfriend made it relatively easier to keep things quiet. A beard was the fake hetero partner.

In our case, I played the role for both of them, as needed. But it was usually only one of them that needed it. The other was pretty "butch", and put was only extended family that weren't aware of their orientation. Most of the time, it was just showing up to family gatherings, pretending to be dating. Every now and then it would be something a bit more complicated, but that's tangential.

So, yeah, it is kinda like filling a seat at public events :)

[-] shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee 2 points 1 year ago

However we want. It's different for everyone of us.

[-] dcoe@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

One of them has to be pretty small and legless. Having no legs is also a plus.

this post was submitted on 22 Jul 2024
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