"Are you guys still serving breakfast?"

It ended 5 hours ago! It's 3 in the afternoon and breakfast hours are clearly posted on the sign. What do you think??

OP, I'll have you know that I pull that joke every single time it happens. And I make sure to throw out a great, heartfelt laugh and slap my knee just to make sure you get the joke.

It's great.

"It must be the network"

-- Webdev who doesn't even understand DNS

Open source business: we support free/open/ethical source software Also business: we use Slack, Google GMail, & Microsoft GitHub for our communication & collaboration Also business: we have a social media presence—which is limited to Instagram, Twitter, Google YouTube, & Discord

Job: Supervisor

Customer pays with a $50 or $100 bill and the till requires that I check it

Customer: "It's good, I just printed it this morning."

Some days I just had to pretend I didn't hear them.

Pro tip: if you have a "go to" joke you always say in a given situation, guaranteed the person you're saying it to has already heard it several times this week. Just don't.

And before anyone responds with "they're just trying to improve your day" they're not. If I don't find the joke funny they get offended, that means they aren't doing it for me, they're doing it to show off how great and funny they are.

Pro tip: don't tell someone a joke if you're going to be offended if they don't laugh.

Job: car detailer

Customer has left their animal in the car at some point, and it is completely trashed

Cashier: *presents EFTPOS machine* Cheque, savings, or credit?

Customer: Savings... More like SPENDINGS, amiright Cashier!? Wooooo! High five for the amazing joke! Up high!

Job: tech support/warranty.

*spare part for repair gets delayed by delivery company by 1 working day (super specific part air post to another country) *

*Item ordered online arrives damaged by courier *

*Out of warranty product is not covered anymore by warranty (suprised pikachu) *

Customer: I did not expect this from a reputable company, like yours. I expect a refund, compensation and a kiss on the ass cheeks from your CEO. Also I will post this on social media and nobody will buy your product, because I am so important and have god like influence and power so better get me free stuff.