No, if they want to be gendered appropriately, they should have it in their username.

You are supposed to do deep research on the person you're commenting to....

I barely even read usernames, plus Voyager App doesn't show profile bios, so even if I wanted to check their profile I can't and I'm sure as fuck not using the mobile website to get the information.

It's reasonable, especially if they got a trans flag in their name. But even if not, it's one click and a swipe back.

I generally just use gender neutral language. I would check the person's bio before using a phrase like that tho, especially if they have a trans flag emoji in their name

That being said, getting banned/restricted for that comment alone seems a bit extreme to me tho

What app do you use? Last I checked, pronouns are part of display names for Hexbear users. You shouldn’t have to check profiles. That’s the whole point of them being included in display names. Your app would ideally just respect display names and it would require no extra effort on your part to gender people correctly.

I'm pretty apathetic to gender in general but I've had gender confirming surgery to be NB which I guess technically makes me trans and to be prefectly honest I've never felt more judged for it than by the lemmy LGBTQ+ community. The 50y/o southern man that was my nursing supervisor back when I was a new graduate was more respectful of my gender and lived experiences than these people. Honestly the thing they seem to hate most is specifically me expressing apathy for gender; I've mentioned that my transness expresses itself by not caring about the whole pronoun thing or needing to have any specific pronouns for myself personally, but that I understand it's a matter of respect for others and I've literally gotten banned for saying that. Like almost exactly that. They're absolutely hateful bastards for no reason other than that they're upset and need everybody else to be upset too. I'm lucky I have a handful of supportive people irl because I sure asf wasn't gonna find it here!

Nah it can’t be expected

Using a client that shows the pronouns in hexbear is good and it sounds like you are doing that now.

As a follow up, I recommend approaching gender just as one would if they were bring mindful with new people. If you don't know pronouns, using they/them is a fine way to start referring to someone neutrally. You can also just use their name. It is considerate to then figure out what they prefer in a non-awkward way, either by how others talk or by just asking them nicely. Having pronouns displayed by names is just helpful for clarity and speeding things up online.

No.

Uh, yes, but its a mutual misunderstanding from both sides...

If they don't list their pronouns and i can't tell by their speech i just go neutral. Checking profiles for gender is definitely not considered necessary in the circles i run in. If poster doesn't make it clear and doesn't have pronouns listed honest mistakes will be made and forgiven