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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/LieComfortable7790 on 2023-09-24 09:53:39.

So my husband and I hosted my sister’s surprise birthday party at our place. It’s a nice size home. My MIL is from Ecuador and has limited English and has lived with us since her husband died in 2020. She’s been great having around the house and loves our two sons. She spoils them more than I like but that’s a whole other issue.

At the party my sister boss Amanda comments to me about how we are so lucky our live in maid is so good with our kids. I said “that’s my fucking mother in law and this is her home too” Amanda gets super embarrassed and leaves shortly afterwards.

My sister hears about the issue when she gets back to work from everyone how rude I was to her manager. I tell my sister that I don’t like it when people make ra.ist assumptions in my own home. My sister gave me Amanda’s phone number and asked me to apologize and I said no. It’s been an ongoing issue my sister said her work is uncomfortable right now and I told her she needs to go to HR because I’m not apologizing to Amanda over this. We got in another huge argument about how much she has liked her job up to this point and if I loved her hat all I would do what’s best for her. I tried explaining if she loved me and my boys she wouldn’t be ok with someone disrespecting their grandmother like that.

The whole incident is causing issues in the family with people taking sides or people trying to tell my sister to go to HR. My sister feels like she’s going to be forced to quit over this incident and this is the best paying job she has ever had.