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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/theshamewizard on 2023-09-27 07:11:32.

AITA for getting up and leaving in the middle of my first date… twice.

AITA

Tonight I went on a first date. I matched with this guy on hinge a couple days ago, we chatted a bit, exchanged numbers and eventually set up a date for tonight. 2 hours ago.

I pull up to the address he gave me and he texts me that he was going to be a few minutes late. No worries. He calls me as he pulls in and finally tells me where we’re going (he wouldn’t tell me before just gave me the address of a shared parking lot). I was walking around a little lost trying find the place as we’re on the phone when I hear him at the bar ordering a drink. Maybe I’m dramatic, but if I can’t find the place we’re meeting at why aren’t you trying to help me instead of going inside and ordering a beer????? Anyway red flag number one. Maybe number two since he wouldn’t tell me where we were going in the first place.

I hang up, I find the bar, I go in, I order a drink, and we sit down at a counter next to each other looking out on the pier. We make a little conversation, and very little eye contact for about 20 or so minutes, maybe even less, while we browse the menu. He was staring out on the water and would randomly say things like “Oh we’re so lucky” “I love the water” “Isn’t this just the best”. But he genuinely did not seem like he was enjoying his time with me. Did not try to ask me questions or make conversation, eye contact, he just didn’t seem that into me. It was nothing super awkward, but definitely not vibing like we were on the phone.

20 minutes in, he says “I gotta go pee, if the waitress comes when I’m gone you can order the appetizer”. Fine. Except…. five, six, seven, then EIGHT minutes goes by and he’s not back from his tinkle. It starts to cross my mind that maybe he left? He had left his card down for the drinks when we ordered, so after 10 minutes I thought, well, at least I got a free drink, I’m out.

I walk back to my car and just as I put my keys in the ignition he texts me asking where I am.

I told him, “ I thought you left so I did too.” I said “you took 10 minutes to pee” He replies that “he didn’t pee but ok”.

I call him and ask if he wants me to come back, he says yes, he’s still there drinking his beer.

I walk back and I sit down and he’s fully engaged in the conversation with the woman next to him. Who also seems to be on a date. She’s a lot older so I’m not assuming he was flirting. However, he didn’t even acknowledge the fact that I came back. I sit there for 4-5 minutes on my phone scrolling Reddit while he continues to ask this woman questions and have a full blown conversation with her.

So, again, for the second time, I gather my stuff up, and leave.

I drove home and got a text from him soon after that reads “I went to the bathroom and was having a conversation so kinda think about if your reaction was justified..but thanks for coming “

Which leaves me thinking… AITA?