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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/xpromanon on 2023-09-22 06:47:47.

throwaway for privacy reasons for everyone involved.

So this happened to me (19 F) last spring, but I'm still getting shit for it so I need to see if I was actually TA in this situation.

Last spring, I was a senior in high school. I was in a class called "Mentor Study" where I was assigned a couple of disabled students to help with homework/classwork/give life advice... etc.

Anyway, there was a boy in this class that I mentored that I'll call "James". James is intellectually disabled ( I won't say with what for privacy). But beyond that he's a super sweet and friendly guy that I had become friends with since the spring semester started. Anyway, fast forward to April, people started getting asked out to prom. A few weeks prior, I had already agreed with a friend group of mine to go with this one particular guy. We didn't tell anyone because he wanted to plan an elaborate "promposal" of sorts later.

one day James comes towards me, with a bunch of teachers and assistants, holding a sign that said "Will you be my prom date?" holding balloons, and he was also holding a box of donuts. I smiled, and went up to him and said I was flattered, but I had already agreed to go with another guy. He was super understanding about it, and said we could share the donuts later in class. However it was super awkward as the TA's and teachers awkwardly smiled at each other and patted James on the back as he headed back down the hallway

Later that day, I started getting a lot of nasty stares in the hallway, and a few friends and acquaintances in school started telling/texting me that I was a A-hole and a bitch for telling him no because "he was disabled" and that I was ruining his high school experience. I just told them that I already planned to go with someone else, and that I wasn't going to "pity" James by going with him just because he was disabled. That semester, I had basically been cast out as the "major bitch" of the school, and a campaign started for a bunch of girls to escort him to the prom. Memes and everything had been made of me online. I had to deactivate my Instagram due to the amount of hate I received

My issue is, I don't think I treated James any differently than any other guy that would have asked me to prom after I already had plans, and didn't see it any differently. It would feel weird and gross to agree only because he has a disability. But apparently my school seems to disagree. despite this, James and I both agreed in class that this awkward encounter wasn't a big deal, and we are still friends to this day, even though now I am in college. I am still getting shit for this to this day... so I wanted to ask AITA? should I have reacted differently or taken him to prom regardless? He did end up going to prom by the way... by the group of girls who started the petition to escort him.

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Mags529 on 2023-09-22 06:27:47.

Ten years ago I (F44) was approached by a company to interview with their CEO for a position I did not apply for. I agreed to take the interview, which was all set up through the CEO’s assistant. It was a Monday morning breakfast meeting at a hotel restaurant. When the day of the interview arrived, I showed up prepared, copy of CV in hand. I did arrive thirty minutes earlier than the meeting time because I didn’t want to take the chance I might be late. So our meeting was at 8AM. When 8AM arrived, he wasn’t around so I thought maybe he’s stuck in traffic. At 8:15, there is no sign of him. At 8:30, there is still no sign of him so I email their assistant who answers immediately with “Let me make sure they have the right restaurant” and then a few moments later they come back with “Please stay - he is en route now!”. It wasn’t until very close to 9AM that the CEO arrives, makes a lame excuse about traffic and then asks the waiter for a menu…and a newspaper. I have a hunch he slept in and/or forgot, but also really surprised he feels there is time for a newspaper. He asks me some really basic questions while eating his breakfast. I think I’m answering them pretty well even though in my head I’m feeling like this interview is not being taken seriously whatsoever. It all ends around 9:20, he says he has a few more candidates but someone will reach out, and we go our separate ways. I’m not feeling good about it at all, but I still send a thank you email for opportunity. He responds back with “Thanks. Best wishes.” I did not hear anything further. It left me feeling somewhat dismissed but more so just really insulted.

Fast forward to last year…one of my closest girlfriends (F42) says she met a nice older man (M56?) through some mutual friends and they’ve had a few nice dates, but it’s not serious. I ask about him and she says “I think you know him, he was CEO of ABC Company.” She remembers me telling her about that awkward interview, and I’m like “ It turns out he is still in my industry, working in a senior (but not c-suite) role at a company connected to mine. II’m not a fan of this person and my girlfriend knows this. She tries to smooth it over by telling me she mentioned me and the awkward interview, but he claims he does not remember it happening. My girlfriend insists with him that it happened and he insists back that it didn’t sound like something he would have done. She comes back and tells me this, which you can imagine, did not help. She jokes “I guess I wont be bringing him to your house anytime soon”.

That was a year ago and they are still together. As I now have a child, I don’t go out often and as a result, haven’t seen her much. When I do it is without him. I know I will have to meet him again at some point, and I will be polite, but I probably will still be feeling this way. Am I the asshole for hanging onto this grudge? Or am I supposed to be ok with the further insult of this guy claiming the awkward interview never happened?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Sunainia on 2023-09-22 03:34:42.

My husband and I were cruising Bourbon St in NOLA on vacation and we come across this guy on the corner selling paintings. He had some interesting stuff, but not really anything that stood out to me as a must have.

My husband asked what he was selling them for and he said $100. My husband asked me what I thought, and I told him “I wouldn’t buy it.”

The guy looked at me and said “My art has hung in galleries, bitch. I’m offering it at that price as a courtesy to him because he’s a horror fan.”

I said “That’s awesome, and I’m not saying your piece isn’t worth $100; it’s just not worth $100 to me.”

AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/throwra832402 on 2023-09-22 10:16:23.

Throwaway because my brother is a redditor I am 23 and male. I am the middle child of my parents, 54 male and 53 female, and I have an older sister, 25, and a younger brother, 19.

I've been living away from my family for 5 years with the very bare minimum of contact because right around when I turned 15, my dad's stuff started disappearing from his room. He has a pocket knife collection filled with different knives that he has collected from across the US, and some of them are pretty decently valuable (not worth like several grand or anything but some of these probably fetch for a few hundred). He also has a collection of baseball cards and autographed baseballs. These items would vanish from his room and end up in my room and each time I got punished for it, and each time was more severe than the last. I was looked at by my entire immediate family as a thief for 3 years even though I constantly pleaded my innocence to them. I missed out on a few vacations, didn't have a 17th birthday celebration at all, didn't get my driver's license or a car until after I moved out, and I didn't have a job and had no way to save money aside from past birthdays and odd chores around my neighborhood. I remember my dad and mom telling me how much of a disappointment I was and that they wouldn't be surprised if I ended up in the local news as a robbery suspect or worse. My extended family wasn't much help either and saw me in the same light. It got so bad to the point where I genuinely wondered if I was actually stealing and not remembering it at all, either through some kind of mental struggle or doing it in my sleep or anything.

Earlier this week, I got a call from my mom. My dad had noticed that his things started disappearing again without me being there and finally had the bright idea to set up cameras in the hall, where my brother was caught taking stuff and putting them in my sister's old room. Mom told me about that and then said that she and my dad both apologize to me for not believing me and that they would love to have me over for her birthday dinner to catch up. I asked her what her plan for my brother's punishment was and she got confused. I asked her again, reminded her that I was forced to miss out on a birthday, multiple vacations, and my driver's license at 16. She said my dad took his phone for a week and his video games for a month. I lost it on her and berated them for treating me way worse while I was being framed for being a thief while the actual thief only had his phone confiscated. I then said I will not be attending any events with them for the future and I said "you guys can go f*ck yourselves." I hung up and blocked her number. I then got a call later from my sister who told me that "while my rage is very much justified, my mother is inconsolable and has locked herself in our parents' bedroom." AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Liaedw on 2023-09-22 05:23:03.

I recently adopted a cat. Saw that she had a missing ear and asked the shelter staff, who said that her former owner did it. They told me she would be put down the next day since no one wanted her so I quickly made my choice.

My sister, upon visiting me and seeing the cat for the first time, said "It's ugly! You should take it back." Our parents who were also visiting nodded.

I just looked at my sister and said 'No offense, but I don't really care about your opinion."

Mom and dad got upset and said I shouldn't speak to my sister that way. They said I could have been nice instead of just saying that I don't care.

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/dadcustody on 2023-09-22 06:01:41.

My sister (15) and I (20) were both adopted. I was adopted when I was 1 and she was adopted when she was 6.

My sister had special needs and the special ed program in our school district apparently had a bad reputation so they homeschooled her. Then when she was 8 my mom decided she couldn’t homeschool her anymore but refused to put her in the special ed program so they started looking for private schools. The only one that would take her was around an hour and a half away each direction. She pretty much disappeared after that.

She used to wake us up at 7, say good morning/bye to me and my younger siblings and leave with my sister. She couldn’t pick me and my siblings up from school anymore so we had to get a babysitter to pick us up and stay with us. She also stopped volunteering in our classes and driving on field trips because she got a part time job next to my sisters school to pay for her tuition (our dad wouldn’t pay her tuition because he said the public school was fine). She would come home at like 5-6:30 depending on traffic, made dinner, had to get my siblings in bed, then I had to go to bed.

She and my dad started fighting around the time my sister started going to that school and they both ended up cheating. They got divorced 5 years ago and I ended up staying with my dad full time. My sister lives with our mom full time and our other siblings are with our mom most of the time but spend every other weekend and most school breaks with me and my dad. I don’t really talk to my mom much anymore.

Last time I talked to her she was saying she hasn’t seen me in forever and why don’t I answer when she calls or stay with her. I always tell her I’m busy when she asks but last time she asked I told her I’m with my dad because she made everything about my sister when she adopted her.

My mom insisted that she tried her best and I told her it still wasn’t good enough.

I could tell she started crying but she didn’t say anything so I hung up. My sister has been texting me saying I’ve always been rude to our mom and she’s trying to have a relationship with me but I’m still mad she had to think of someone other than me.

AITA for telling my mom Im with my dad because she made everything about my sister

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/CharacterTart7612 on 2023-09-22 05:57:38.

I (27 M) recently got married to my wonderful husband. It was a small wedding with just our family and closest friends. My husband and I both love space, so we decided to have a space themed wedding. We had star decorations, a galaxy marble cake, and fairy lights. I even wore a tux with little white stars. My sister (32 F) was invited to be the ring bearer as she and I are very close. However, when she showed up at the wedding, she was wearing a Halloween costume of Saturn. She was literally dressed up like the planet. We made it very clear in our invitations that this wedding was strictly formal. My sister and I joke around a lot, so I laughed about it and asked her to get ready as the wedding was starting soon. But she fully planned to bring us the rings in her Halloween costume. She refused to change into a serious outfit, saying that our family would find it funny because Saturn has rings and she's the ring bearer. This was the most important day of my life, and I expected her to take it seriously, even though we often joke around. So I told her she could change or she could leave. She called me over dramatic and left. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Fresh-Cartographer23 on 2023-09-22 04:56:13.

I (60f) often go visit my sister and her husband in another province, flying there and back. This time I decided to invite my husband (59m) along with me for the first time. He wasn’t very keen on going due to our home situation: our daughter, 24f, still lives with and is heavily dependent on us as she is recovering from severe substance use disorder, and her mental age is really more like 13 due to the effects.

This has caused issues when leaving her home alone in the past, for example the last time I went to visit my sister, my husband wasn’t home the whole time because he flies in and out for work, and while we were away she relapsed, had random people over to our home which was not allowed, made a disaster of the house, and was so high on amphetamines that she was delusional, and calling all of our other children yelling unintelligibly (we have three other kids who are all out of the house). She also has a habit of leaving taps running for no reason, and is generally not a very responsible person even when we are home.

I convinced my husband to come along anyway, however, because she hasn’t used in a few months so I thought it would be fine, plus it wanted him to help cover the costs for the trip. During one of the layovers, he had a phone call with our daughter and afterwards told me he got a bad feeling, that her voice sounded off and he wanted to turn around and go back. I again convinced him that he was overthinking things and it would be fine, so he agreed to keep going.

The day after we arrive, however, I receive a text from my son saying that we should probably book the first flight home. Apparently he had gone to check up on the house over the night and had discovered our daughter clearly high, the house in absolute disarray, a street person and their dog in our house, and the basement flooded. I guess they were both too high to take the dog out because it had defecated in the house multiple times. She had also been driving our car around, which we left her the keys to, in this state.

My husband knew he would need to go home to deal with it, and I decided I would stay and enjoy the last five days of the vacation since it had already been paid for and we might as well get our moneys worth. My husband didn’t oppose this and has gone home to deal with the extensive damage due to the flooding, however my other children are saying that this was unfair to him and selfish on my part since the vacation was my idea. My husband is also saying I should have listened to his concerns. I tried to explain that I have to enjoy my life even if I’m caring for my daughter and it’s not fair for me to not be able to go on vacation anymore due to this, and that I couldn’t have seen this coming, but they are still saying I should have known better and shouldn’t be making my husband deal with everything. Am I the asshole here?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/TopicFlimsy1304 on 2023-09-22 05:16:49.

In my younger 20s I had gotten married to Amanda and we were together for five years before divorcing. We had no kids. Flash forward almost 20 years later and I've remarried with kids.

When my eldest Jack started middle school, I found out that Amanda had a daughter named Lee the same age as Jack and was going to be going to the same school. My son and Lee had shared friends and because of that me and Amanda would run into each other. We were friendly but it was super weird.

I found out that Jack and Lee are actually dating. I told Jack that I was actually married to Lee's mom when I was much younger and therefore it's wholly inappropriate and weird to be dating Lee. He didn't believe me because I'm gay so I showed him my divorce decree. He said he really doesn't care and the whole thing was weird. I said I do care and he can't date my ex-wife's daughter. That's weird to be dating her.

Edit: They're not in middle school. They're juniors in high school now.

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Traditional-Plum8958 on 2023-09-22 02:08:49.

i (45f) have a daughter (14f) and i have been raising her by myself since she was 7. i love her so much but we've never really gotten along. anyway we live in the "hood" as you may call it ever since my daughters father left us 7 years ago. i have been getting more financial support from my boyfriend so now im able to find a nice place in a better town.

the problem comes where i found a really nice apartment in a town about 30 minutes away. ive looked up this town and drove there with my daughter. and i loved it. my daughter on the other hand did not. she said it looked boring and depressing which i wont deny its pretty small. my daughter and i looked up the school ratings in this town and its only 1% low income and 97% white (i am white blonde hair pale skin, while my daughter is black, curly hair) my daughter was not happy about this and asked me to recondsider.

i said no because this is what is best for us, she told me to "hop off" and said "i dont wanna live in this bum ass white town" and that "your white bruh u dont get it" i told her that thats not how i raised her. and i told her we are going and thats not changing. i heard her in her room trying not to cry.

everyone i asked said they have no opinion. i might be ta because shes expirienced bullying before and this poor/mostly black area we live in is all shes ever known. But she did disrespect me and prejudice against any race is not ok. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Swimming_Ad1697 on 2023-09-22 02:32:48.

i'm the hiring manager at an average hotel.

I hired Holly last month. She was applying for housekeeping and I could tell from her resume and just her personality she was not outgoing. She was very direct during the interview process. she told me she favored independent work. she asked if we require cross training and would she have to be trained on 'desk'. I said no unless she wanted.

She explained she thrived working more on her own, she could be professional, but is more on the quiet side (I get the impression she may have anxiety or autism)

she was hired on, trained a week and was doing super well at housekeeping.

because of a change in higher management, we changed our minds on cross training and let Holly know. she seemed displeased. I told her the trainer would be great and help her along the way.

It didn't go super well, but now that we've invested in training her on desk, it is what it is.

i let Holly know if she doesn't get the just of being on desk we're just going to extend her training on it longer. She told me it was just not going to fit, and to please just put her back on housekeeping as she was hired for that. I told her she would work the shift once in a blue moon and just get through the training.

well this afternoon I get a text from her trainer saying Holly snapped at her in front of guests checking into their room. apparently Holly was explaining some things to them and the trainer began to talk over her (accidentally) so Holly snapped and yelled if you're going to train me, train me, don't interrupt me and talk all over me.

I called Holly, told her this could result in a write up which is not good for the first month of employment, and we'll talk more when we see each other. she asked again if she could back to housekeeping. and once again I told her no, she needs to suck it up and deal with customers. my boyfriend and I are sort of strained at the moment, so after hearing the convo he told me I was an absolute s**t manager who was just letting this poor women fail because of a power trip. I guess I thought it was him just being angry at me like usual, but now I'm curious, am I wrong? Like this is my job...

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/PsychologicalSlip697 on 2023-09-22 01:32:23.

For some background information, my 28m wife 30f has a best friend, D 30m, who she has been friends with since she started college. He was the first friend she made at school and they've been close ever since. I always liked him and think he's a pretty chill guy. There's also another guy, P 31m, who's a friend I made at my job. Us 4 plus others are in a larger friend group of about 10. P is kinda new to the group, as I've just recently invited him. P also broke it off with his fiancé (who he'd been with 6 years) about 2 months ago because he found out she was cheating with someone she claimed was "just a friend." We have all tried to be supportive because we know that he is dealing with a lot because of that.

Anyways, ever since the breakup, he has made some super rude comments about my wife and D. He's continually told to me that he thinks she's cheating with him and that I need to start investigating, but when I ask for any proof of this he just says "if it happened to me it can happen to anybody." At first I tried to be sympathetic and just explain that I trust both of them and know there isn't anything going on, but it didn't stop. It seemed like he was constantly saying things like this to me, but I tried my best to ignore it.

I didn't really care too much until he started doing it in front of the group. Me, D, and my wife would usually try to ignore it, but it seemed like that didn't work because it just kept getting worse. He kept making comments about how she was gonna leave me for him, she's probably in love with him, and other outlandish stuff. Usually, we just blow it off or laugh as if he's telling a joke, but the other day I think he took it too far.

While all of us were having a board game night, P made the comment that my wife probably uses D for "black dick" since I obviously "can't provide." (D and my wife are black, I'm white). This really pissed me off and I could tell my wife was mortified. I told P in front of everyone that he is an insecure creep who needs to get his shit together. Everyone kinda went silent and game night just kinda fizzled out after that. I felt guilty for ruining the atmosphere and texted my other friends apologizing. They all agree that P was out of line, but they think I only fueled it and made it more awkward when I should have ignored it. My wife and D have both told me they appreciate me standing up for them, but I still feel bad. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/20160314 on 2023-09-22 03:20:57.

Wife and I (40s) have 3 kids, Alice (12F), Bobby (10M), and Claire (8F), just started grades 7, 5 and 3, all same school.

Last month, Bobby's grade 5 teacher started a parent WhatsApp group.

A week before school started, teacher posted into the WhatsApp group... apparently, one of the kids in the class had had head lice. No big deal, it's been treated and cured. Kid caught it at summer camp.

Someone in the WhatsApp said "Sometimes the treatment for head lice includes cutting one's hair really short. What if the whole class cuts their hair really short? Then no one will know or care who had the head lice".

Parents chimed in: What a great idea, we should totally do that.

One parent to agree with that opinion was a dad whose son David is in Bobby's class, and also whose daughter Emily is in Claire's class.

Talked to Bobby about it and he agreed, so 2 days before school started, we got him a military buzz cut. Actually looks good!

On the first day of school, exactly 2 kids in the class showed up with short hair... our son Bobby, and David.

What a bunch of AH parents was one of my first thoughts.

My wife takes the kids to school, and mentioned to me over the weekend the strange looks and scowls she encountered.

Then, over the weekend, I learned that David's dad had told a few of people that obviously it was Bobby who'd had head lice.

David had been to summer camp, as had his little sister Emily, and both showed up at school with short hair.

Knowing this, I messaged David's father asking him why the hell he'd spread false rumours like that, especially knowing it was his own son.

It wasn't a pleasant discussion. He denied he'd said it, then admitted it but said David didn't have lice, but then admitted in fact David did, but he had been treated and it was all ok and what's the big deal.

The big deal is that you've made my son the target of bullying with your bullshit lies.

He made stupid evasive excuses, David is a sensitive kid and was already feeling very down, sorry, but that's how it is.

Great, so throw my kid under the bus? And make my wife and I look like shitty parents who can't keep their kids clean? (Btw, head lice can happen to anyone. It has little to do with hygiene)

I told him... what you did is awful, and you need to come clean, and tell everyone.

He said he would... and didn't. Then, prodded again, he said he would... and didn't. Yesterday, I told him... if you don't post something about this by tonight, I will.

So, now it's tonight. I have the WhatsApp message ready to go. It's a work of art, with screenshots and everything. It makes it clear David's dad was spreading lies.

I'm ready to pull the trigger, but am curious what you all think.

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Unlucky-Substance202 on 2023-09-22 02:10:57.

TLDR is basically just the title.

My (M41) wife Jane* turns 40 in November. A few years ago for her birthday I bought her a pair of AirPod Pros since she needed new headphones. I've got a set and she borrowed them a lot, so I knew she'd use them. She loved them. She takes good care of her things but since then hers have started acting up/glitching, and also losing battery quickly. I know it frustrates her. Mine don't have these issues, but they're obviously not brand new as I've had them for a couple years.

I have the opportunity to get a new pair for free through my job. I have no need of a new set but why pass up the opportunity? And since her birthday is right around the corner, I'm planning to give her my old set.

I want to clarify that I am not planning on only giving her a pair of used headphones. I've got three or four other gifts, that I'm sure she will love. That being said I worry that she'll see me giving her my old pair as hand-me-downs or as me splurging on myself instead of on her. I wouldn't be surprised since I myself might feel a bit of resentment if someone bought themselves a new item and gifted me the old one. I don't want to pass on the opportunity to get a new pair for free, and I also don't want to toss out my current pair, and I'm sure it sounds selfish but I want a new pair for myself, not get a new pair and give it away.

So I guess my question is, would it make me the asshole if I gave her my current (used) pair while keeping the new pair for myself?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Aggressive_Archer_80 on 2023-09-22 02:31:58.

For background, my mother left my eldest grandchild $40k+ for college. He was a minor when she passed and I was left in charge of the money. She told me it was to be used for his college education. Right out of high school he moved into an apartment and started to attend community college. He had a scholarship for the first two semesters so we weren’t worried about using the inheritance yet. He also paid rent with his own savings from working on the family farm so again, no need for the inheritance at this point.

Well after the first semester he decided college wasn’t for him. He got a job as a heavy equipment operator and lived in the same college town for 4 years.

After 4 years of working in construction he moved back home to work on the family farm full time. The farm is owned by my husband and my son(the father of my grandson). My husband is too old to carry on with the strenuous work of farm life, and my son fell into deep depression after divorcing his second wife and started to abuse alcohol. My grandson moved back here and took over all the duties on the farm.

He’s currently 25 years old and for the last 3 years he’s been running the farm. I do all the bookwork as I have for the last 50+ years, but he does everything else and has helped keep the business afloat. He lives in an RV on the farm property because he doesn’t want to pay rent in town and he says he’s closer to work this way also.

He says he loves this life and wants to stay farming no matter how much we’ve tried to convince him to get a college degree and pursue something that will make him more money. The only other thing he loves is cooking which he says just isn’t a viable career path for him money-wise, unless he were to open his own deli/restaurant. These last couple months he’s sat down with me and his grandpa and told us he should have access to his college funds. His argument is that he’s 25, has proven he’s independent as an adult, and doesn’t see himself benefiting from college. Also told us that college wasn’t a wise investment for him because of his plans. He says he won’t blow it on stupid things but may use it to jumpstart a business(his deli/restaurant). I refuse to give it to him outright because that money was for college, not for starting a business. He says he feels belittled because he’s an adult and we’re withholding his money from him. But I don’t believe that’s the case. It was left for college and should be honored as such. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/-ara-bella- on 2023-09-21 20:51:22.

I F(21) have 2 pregnant friends, 20 and 22, who woke me up from my nap with a call asking me to go buy them the cheesecake they’re craving. One of them is 16 weeks along and the other is 7 weeks. Normally I definitely would, but I was extremely tired and in bed. Neither of them have a car. I don’t either, but I have access to my mom’s car, and they were telling me I should just use it to get them their cravings. They kept persisting and I kept saying no because I was so tired and was trying to get a nap in before I have to pick up my sister from school, which was in about an hour from when they called. I feel kind of bad since they are pregnant and can’t get it themselves, but I also don’t want to risk getting on the road while drowsy. So, AITA?

Edit: Since a lot of people are asking, food delivery service isn’t available for the particular restaurant they want the cheesecake from. It’s a specific kind of cheesecake that only this store makes.

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Pink_CheetahPrint on 2023-09-22 03:30:03.

I, (F29) and my husband, (M30) were high school sweethearts. We met in sophomore year of high school and hit it off, which meant we began to hang out outside of school. I started developing feelings for him about a year after we met, and soon found out they were reciprocated.

Now, I know I may sound like the asshole in the vague context of the title: However, I don’t think I am at all. I need some input.

Me and my husband began trying for a baby about 3 years ago: and being unsuccessful multiple times was incredibly deterring. However, about 5 months ago, I found out I was pregnant. To say I was happy is an understatement. My husband seemed ecstatic in due course, his wariness quickly overturned by the excitement of being a father.

My husband has always voiced how much he wanted a son. During my pregnancy, my husband posted paragraphs about how incredibly thrilled he was to become a father. Although, he seemed to always manage to rope in his hopes of being a boy father into his words. I didn’t necessarily have a problem with it at the time.

About 4 months into my pregnancy, my doctor scheduled a gender revealing ultrasound. As always on my appointments, my husband tagged along. As we drove, I took a mental note of his anxious habits. Biting his nails, tapping his hands on the steering wheel, breathing hard. It was understandable. As we arrived, we were whisked away by a doctor to the room.

As they began the ultrasound, my husbands jitters slowed. My doctor spoke aloud in elated tone: “It’s a girl! Congratulations!” Dead silence. Without even finishing the appointment, my husband stood up quietly and stormed out. The air was heavy with tension as I cleaned up and headed towards the lobby. I found my husband sitting on his phone in the waiting room, brows furrowed.

He saw me and forced a smile. As we headed back to the car, I noticed how he avoided my questions. I tried to brush it off, thinking it was just a twinge of quick passing disappointment: however, I soon realized it was much deeper than that.

As we parked in our driveway, I broke the silence with a considerate “Are you alright?” “Do I look fucking okay?” Hubby says, “You know how much I wanted to raise a man like my father raised me.” He began raising his voice, each word growing to be painful and cruel.

I was already in pain, exhausted, and frustrated as he spewed several underhanded accusations and unwarranted insults out at me. I snapped. “You’re already a pathetic excuse of a father and our daughter isn’t even born yet,”

Silence.

He left quickly afterwords and informed me that he will be staying with a friend for a couple of days. His family has been blowing up my phone with messages I refuse to read, and my own family is telling me that I went too far and should apologize.

Am I the asshole for telling my husband that he’s “already a pathetic excuse of a father,”?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Imaginary_Series7887 on 2023-09-22 03:05:24.

My distant cousin (who I’m not close with) is having a unisex baby shower at my aunts house where she is charging $30 a person to attend. It’s at their house and she’s choosing to have it catered. I do not want to pay $60 to attend a baby shower I’m also expected to bring a gift to.

I have hosted many parties at my home and have never charged people for the food that I’ve served or the alcohol that I’ve purchased.

Not only is it a stipulation, they are hounding people for it.

AITA for thinking this is odd, or not wanting to pay?

I should ETA She's the one pregnant, and also she attended my baby shower recently and although she didn't bring a gift she did hand me a $50 bill before she left! I appreciate it but it feels like an afterthought

We're not close at all didn't grow up around each other and have nothing in common but we always try to support ea others events but it's sometimes awkward around them...

So I feel bad not attending but also, it just rubs me wrong to be charged to attend a baby shower. I RSVPd before realizing the fee and now they're sending out mass inboxes not to forget the $30. Me and my girlfriend were invited to attend so it's $60

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Commercial_Pea9429 on 2023-09-22 00:12:14.

Okay I so(45F) have 3 kids. Ages 17,14 and 9. They’ve all gone to the same elementary school. My 14 year old is Tanara and my 9 year old is Tamyah. Tanara was diagnosed with cancer in 5 grade, her teacher at the time, Ms. M set up a fundraiser for her with some parents in her class. I was very thankful to her although I didn’t know her very well.

Anyways my younger daughter Tamyah has 2 best friends Aarschni and Katie, they’ve been friends since pre k. Aarschni has been staying with us for a few days while her mom is on a work trip. Earlier today I got a call from her mom asking if I could pick her up from school because she threw up. I did and when I got there Katie and Tamyah were with her and told me that they were walking back to class after getting something from the office and then Aarschni started throwing up in the hallway completely randomly. It happened to be right outside of Ms. M’s room.

Ms. M came out to yell at them about being quiet in the hallway and then immediately Katie and Tamyah asked her for help. Then she rolled her eyes, went inside her classroom and then came out, handed Katie a roll of paper towels and said she’d call the nurse and then walked right back to her classroom. They were shocked and stayed there and waited for the nurse. BTW none of them knew who ms. M was and just regarded her as “the 5th grade teacher”

When they told me this i immediately called Aarschni’s mother to ask if she wanted me to talk to the school about it and she said yes definitely and that she would call them later if I didn’t want to. But I went to the main office with Katie and Tamyah and reported what happened. The checked the security footage and showed it to me and sure enough what they said was true. Not even making sure she was okay. She just had 2 9 year olds attempt to clean up the other ones vomit while she cried.

They called the teacher down to the office immediately and I left. About an hour ago Ms M Facebook messaged me and told me that she has vomit phobia or something and couldn’t deal with it and said after all she’s done for my family it’s ridiculous that I reported her for some strangers kid. I also want to add that there’s 2 teachers in every classroom(she didn’t even tell the other teacher in the room) but if she really cared she could’ve asked the other teacher to go deal with it. I just think it’s unprofessional for someone choosing to work with little kids to let that happen, if she was a Highschool or even middle school teacher I’d feel differently but these are 9 year old kids and she’s an adult. Maybe I am an Ahole but even after I found out who she was I didn’t feel much remorse about informing the school. So AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/ThankYouMrBen on 2023-09-21 23:13:09.

My wife and I have small children (under 5 years old). So does the couple next door. The way our street is set up, our "front" doors face each other (they're on the sides of our houses), and are only separated by about 15-20 feet. You can easily see inside one house from the other if the doors are open.

The couple next door and my wife had a discussion when I wasn't around, and all agreed that if one of the couples decided to go out, we could just give the baby monitor to the other couple to "watch" the kids. In fairness to them, they only said they'd do this while the kids were asleep (so they're not leaving kids unsupervised and awake), and the signal for the baby monitor DOES reach from one house to the next. When I heard the idea, I immediately said no. What if there's a fire or some other emergency? What if the monitor's signal gets disconnected and we don't realize it? What if the kids wake up to find an empty house? My wife begrudgingly told the other couple the deal was off, and they've been cold to me ever since. So reddit, AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/rocknglow13 on 2023-09-21 23:31:37.

So I recently got married to the love of my life. I had my niece nephew and my husband's niece and nephew in the wedding. My family...mom, dad, brother, niece, nephew, and SIL flew in from where they live. My SIL and I have never really gotten along, I don't know why, we just haven't. My mother who is amazing has decided that my wedding was going to be a dry wedding. I didn't consent to that and said as much. My SIL has a drinking problem and is just plain bitchy around me. She wouldnt even participate in family photos and literally screamed at me 3 times. I ignored it. After a while some of the guests asked if they could bring out some alcohol I said sure. My wedding was 3-? And I asked that alcohol be brought out at 8 pm and anyone under 21 leave by 730. My SIL stayed around and when the alcohol came out my mom had a fit about it. I looked at my mom and said I have given into your whims and hers my whole entire time of knowing SIL. Today is my fucking day. I don't give a shit about her alcoholism. My mom looked so sad so reddit am I the asshole?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/HidingFromHate on 2023-09-21 20:30:11.

I had a low pressure reading on my car dash panel so I went have it looked at, made an appointment at a space that sells tyres (spelled tires if you are American). As I could drive to the store I didn’t consider it a flat.

I went into the store and a man said oh you’re here for the flat tyre. I said, well I have a low pressure warning. He looks down at me (he was rather tall) and said “so you mean you have a flat tyre.” I said no, again repeated it was just a warning and the tyre was still inflated, and he said again “so you have a flat tyre.” The smug look on his face rather upset me. I answered back calmly, I’m not going to argue semantics with you, will you kindly look at my tyre to see if something is stuck in it. He repeated, once again, that I meant I had a flat tyre.

I did not appreciate being smirked at and corrected incorrectly, so I said “sorry I don’t like your attitude, I am leaving.” I left the place and left a poor review on google, now the manager is reaching out to me about it. I haven’t answered yet but will say, if I do, that I felt he was being condescending because I am female. I don’t think having a low pressure warning equates to a flat and that his repeated correction to me without ever having laid eyes on the tyre or even my car was unwarranted. (As an aside, I did have a door hinge or some such thing stuck and it went flat a few hours later, but that’s beside the point.)

AITA for walking out and leaving him a bad review and possibly getting him in trouble with his manager?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Medical_Switch3213 on 2023-09-21 21:44:02.

Throwaway. We (both30’s) have separate finances. We moved for his job so I'm in between jobs. It was agreed that he would take care of the finances until I find and start my job. This is the first time he's had to support the family on his solo income. (I do add in 1k per month from my savings)

He's previously been pretty bad with finances and never worried. He said himself, this is the first time he has been anxiously waiting for each paycheck. I have the means (savings) to help him out but I want him to experience hardship and learn money management so I haven't offered to help out financially (and he hasn't asked, though he does ask me daily when I'll start my job). Our income is currently less than our expenses.

In the past, I told him he must have an emergency fund, but he never bothered to save up for it. He'll have like 2k in emergency fund (our family expense is easily 6-8k now). He's also learning to look at prices before buying and weighing wants vs needs. I feel like it's a time of personal growth for him.

Would I be an AH to continue this for 2 more months just so he can grow?

(he's always irked me because he'll always say "don't worry about it" but then if we come up short, I have had to foot the bill. Ie. when we had our baby, I told him we owed like 3k and he was like "oh, I have no money" which was super annoying).

FYI- I have not been delaying work. It takes a few months to change jobs in my field (between solving for new license/paper work and 2-4 weeks after working to actually get my paycheck. He’s completely aware of the timeline. I tried to tell him he can’t afford it in his income but he disagreed and said he’ll make enough.

He forgot to account for rent increase (from 1.5k to 4.5k), daycare cost, and his own tax… therapist suggested me “so maybe don’t save him next him?” Because he has learned that I will always be the financial safety net

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/barbiegirll222 on 2023-09-21 23:15:21.

I (F21) and my boyfriend (M21) have been together for just shy of a year. We started out as roommates so we’ve lived together/been really close the entire time. We have sex very frequently, probably around 4-5 times a week. I love having sex with him, but I am not able to finish with just penetration. This topic of conversation makes me uncomfortable so I never brought it up, until last week. I reached my breaking point. He has never even tried to make me finish, whether it was orally or with his hands. His lack of touching me/trying to please me has made me grow extremely self conscious. It makes me wonder if he thinks I’m gross or something is wrong with me. I finally gathered the courage to admit this to him, thinking we were close enough that we could have a mature conversation on the subject and reach a solution. Boy was I wrong. Even though I was very gentle with my words and made sure he knew I still loved him, he lost his shit. He accused me of cheating on him and said that I could no longer be trusted if I had been keeping this big of a secret for this long. This huge fight happened days before my 21st birthday. He decided to still come out and celebrate with me and my friends even though we weren’t getting along. Of course with the consumption of alcohol, chaos ensued. He ended up telling me that he will never give me head or finger me because it’s “gross” and none of his other girlfriends have had this problem. We proceeded to fight for 4 hours (until 6 am, ON MY BIRTHDAY) I know that I hurt his feelings and it was probably hard to hear his girlfriend say he’s never once made her finish, but I had nothing but good intentions. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Original-Dish905 on 2023-09-21 21:19:17.

I (40f) am the controller at a medium size company. I love my job and have two staff accountants (31f and 34f)and an accounting assistant(23f) I manage. The accounting assistant is amazing. She picks up on everything quick, she’s the sweetest, a very hard worker. However, she is a full time employee and has caused a bunch of trouble in my department.

She is young and has a few pet gerbils but no kids or a spouse. She negotiated 100 hours of PTO and 10 remote days to get her to take her current position because we were despate so she transferred over. We don’t allow for more than 1 person in the accounting department to be on vacation or out of office at a time. The accounting assistant is constantly on vacations. She went to Europe for 2 weeks and worked remotely for 4 days, on a road trip and worked remotely a day and used PTO, she was on bereavement leave because her brother passed, went to Egypt for a week and worked remotely a couple days, now she wants to book a week off for a roadtrip with some remote time, and a week off next year for a vacation in Ireland. A staff accountant asked a week ago for the same week she is on her next road trip off to take her kids on vacation and has already booked the arrangements. I denied the request and told her that I would talk to the assistant about switching her road-trip. The assistant said that she booked the week off first and would like to go on her road trip that week. It feels to me like she is just doing that to make everyone frustrated and is quite childish. I told her that she would need to tell the accountant. This happened with the same accountant who tried to book time off to see her mother while the assistant had already booked the time off to go to Egypt. I practically had to beg her let the accountant have her time off.

Additionally, I’ve received complaint of this assistant talking about her vacations and trips and it makes the accountants feel like she is bragging. The assistant takes a lot of weekend trips and goes to concerts and when the accountants ask how her weekend was she’ll say “good, I went to this or this concert” or say “it was ok, I went to this place to hike “ it doesn’t feel like bragging to me but I told her to keep her weekend escapades to herself.

This morning I was talked to by my boss saying that the assistant wrote an email to her about everything that happened and I was written up for it. The email said that the assistant is happy to just come to work and work and not talk about her life but that she is confused because others ask her about her life and that she is following the handbook and just enjoying her benefits with asking for PTO and that she is feeling singled out because she doesn’t have kids and that makes her plans less valuable.

AITA here?