Hey. I might be judging this Situation wrong but I feel like my wife cant do anything alone and she never leaves the house and I have no time for me.

Sorry but my phone is making capitel Letters cause english isnt my main language and sorry for Bad english.

My wife and I are 31 and been together 12 years. I love her.

Since a few years I notice how all her friends moved away, she failed her exams and has nothing. So I understand her Situation.

I noticed she cant do anything alone or always wants me to join in even though we spent the whole day together already.

She cant just bake a cake. She always ask if I can help and Im like sure okay and in the end all I do is messure sugar, melt butter... its like a thing Id do alone to unwind.

She wants to go eat ice in town. I say no I dont wsnt to and she is like "okay" and goes watching TV. I wsnt to play computer but feel bad because she is bored, watches no shows... all she does is watch garden tv where they build St.pid Pools lol.

If I were her Id go without "me" and unwind. Heck, if she wants to stsy home I go drink coffee alone or with friend and just scroll reddit and watch ppl. She cant. She stays home and waits til im done playing. The thing is I could play forever. My friends all play starcraft and overwatch.

But if I do play I cant enjoy it cause I have a wife a room next to me being bored. I feel like I have to entertain her.

She has no hobbies, all her friends moved away, she has no job,... and if I were hin her Position Id still be fine cause I have so much to do. I can go swim, watch ppl, do nothing, play games, read, cook etc and all alone. Sometimes I enjoy if Im alone which is rare.

This weekend she visits her friends and is gone til tomorrow and its sad because now I feel so free. I can sleep in without feeling bad, i can game all night. This morning I was in the local Spa and just sat in whirlpool 3 hours alone. It was so good knowing I can do all that without having the feeling to entertain someone waiting for me.

I feel so bad. I feel bad for wishing to live alone again or maybe wishing shed be gone atleast once a week. If I coulf only have like 1 or 2 days I wouldnzt see anyone id be happy. I mean no one. Im really happy alone, I can Bing watch shows or podcasts and be happy. Take my phone or pc and Id just go to the local coffee store and sit for 4 hours.

Maybe Im the problem because I feel like I dont need anyone. I love her though and cant wait til she comes back tomorrow but those 2 days are so nice.

Another random examples of what I mean:

1. She wants to cook and is hungry. Im not hungry and dont wanna cook. She eats cereal. If I were her Id still cook lol. Now I feel bad cause she is eating garbage cause I dont wanna cook and eat.

2. She wants to visit her parents. Okay, fine but I stay home. She: Ill go lay down

Mh okay? Now I cant go to the local coffee Shop and drink coffee cause she is sleeping cause I dont want to go to her parents. Okay I could go to the coffee Shop but I now know she is either joining, which is fine, but rather would go to her parents. I feel bad again.

3. Vacation. I ask where she wants to go this year, she says she doesnt care. I say mh ok... Thailand? She says "we were there last year" and Im like "yeah was nice" and now I know she doesnt want to go there but cant say a Different destination. Now Im stuck. I ask Malaysia. She says "maybe".

Wtf now I cant book a flight. I know she wants to go to Sri Lanka. Why cant she just say it???

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I have decision paralysis in organizing my work and self-study flow. While working on one thing, I keep agonizing as to if that's what I should be doing and lose time doing so. I keep trying to let go of this mindset and I just fail.

How do I improve on this, how do I make sure that I don't lose time while trying to buy time by optimizing my workload? Is my workload too much? Am I trying to achieve a lot of things at once? But if I don't, I'll probably never get to where I have to be, yet chasing all of this means I'll be stuck in a spot for a long while, perhaps I let go of my dreams and just lay flat.

I try fixating certain tasks to certain times, I've cut down on a lot of things, creating a huge backlog that I might not go through in 10 lifetimes.

How do you make sure you do the things you have to do, when you have to do them and not feel like it's a waste of time you should put elsewhere even after you've decided that the task at hand is paramount?

You reply in the comments, and i try to guess your age based on a short conversation we have. That's it!

For me I think it's gotta be eye crinkles. Nature's eyeliner.

That and having enough self knowledge to make decisions that actually benefit me.

Tell us where you are going so I can live vicariously through you while I stare at the snow.

Sometimes one just doesn't have the energy to do what needs done. How do you manage it?

(prompted by the thread about repetitive topics)

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Teenage me in 1994 trying to combine helpfulness and knowitallness. Some things never change.

I hope Rudy got that Ultrastar and other cool stuff too.

And I was SOOO close to truly being a part of the original hordes of eternal September, but I was really about 9-12 months too late.

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