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this post was submitted on 24 Feb 2025
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Asklemmy
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Ima be honest. I just don’t fuck with pronouns. I’ll typically use they even if I know what their preferred ones are. That or whatever feels better for what I’m talking about.
You are describing intentional misgendering. That's against our instance rules, so make sure you use preferred pronouns for folks who display them.
I would argue calling all they/them is the opposite of misgendering. "They" has no gender. It is neuter.
"Intentional non-gendering" seems sensible and inoffensive. No chance of misgendering anyone.
I'm a gender abolitionist philosophically, so I get what you are saying and I would also prefer for everyone to agree to adopt using gender neutral language and be done with it. But we should still respect the preferred pronouns of others, because it isn't up to you or me to force that choice on everyone else. It's not much different from a Republican (for example) refusing to use she/her towards a trans woman. For some folks their pronouns are super important to them, so imo it's just disrespectful not to use them when they are stated.