228

How do I avoid becoming a crotchety old man? I’m seriously asking. (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 year ago by yokonzo@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.world

76 comments fedilink hide all child comments

You know the type, probably a good father or worker, but serious faced all the time, never smiles, often in a bad mood, very cynical. It’s just I feel like I’m on the path to this, I’m 28, just escaped 12 years of food service so I’m already super cynical and if someone comes up to me, I’m super ready to shut down whatever’s about to happen. I feel like working with customers for years I’ve learned to have giant walls up and I can’t seem to remove them. I see the other guys in the factory I’m working at laughing and joking all the time, I think of myself as funny but it’s always deadpan humor and I wish I could genuinely smile and laugh and make friends with the other guys. Any old timers or well travelers out there have any advice?

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[-] intensely_human@lemm.ee 14 points 1 year ago

Join a men’s group. Nothing else in my life has softened my face more.

[-] botengang@feddit.de 8 points 1 year ago

What is a men's group? Can you elaborate

[-] yokonzo@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

I assume he means like a group of guys who get together and just do some activity

[-] reagansrottencorpse@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

I think he means a group like the NY Jack's

[-] intensely_human@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago

Sort of like a cross between group therapy and a mastermind group. Mostly we just check in which whatever’s good or bad going on, how it makes us feel. There’s a focus on minimizing the details and sticking to what things feel like right here and now, as a way of getting in tune with what feelings are present.

I had no idea this was true, but I couldn’t identify which feelings I was feeling. I only expressed, and allowed myself to identify, emotions that matched who I was in my story.

Now I feel my actual literal emotions. Directly. It’s made it so much easier to make life decisions. And I feel a lot less out of place in life. I actually feel like part of humanity now.

[-] botengang@feddit.de 1 points 1 year ago

Sounds fantastic. Is there an organization for such groups? I've never heard of them before.

Maybe apart from masonic lodges...

load more comments (2 replies)

this post was submitted on 17 Aug 2023

228 points (96.7% liked)

Ask Lemmy

26890 readers

700 users here now

A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions

Please don't post about US Politics. If you need to do this, try !politicaldiscussion@lemmy.world

Rules: (interactive)

1) Be nice and; have fun

Doxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them

2) All posts must end with a '?'

This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?

3) No spam

Please do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.

4) NSFW is okay, within reason

Just remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either !asklemmyafterdark@lemmy.world or !asklemmynsfw@lemmynsfw.com. NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].

5) This is not a support community.

It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.

Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.