You've got extremely valid feelings. Mine are quite similar. I do find myself asking "what's the fucking point?" far more often than I'd like.

Rather like the classic "what's the meaning of life?", I don't think that anyone can answer that for anyone else. For me, it's a love of my fellow human beings and belief that, based upon historical evidence, authoritarianism's grip on society always crumbles. It might take a World War, or it may take centuries of insurgency, but it is inevitable. In order for that to happen, people need to experience kindness and empathy. And people need to be willing to be builders, rather than just violent fighters (every society founded in violence and bloodshed has been vulnerable to authoritarians coopting the movement). So, I keep pushing because it might help others when I'm gone. Hell, maybe it will help lead to the cultural and psychological changes necessary to approach the anarchic society of my ideals (I don't think I'll ever directly have that much influence or desire it but every small bit helps).

And there's also spite. Authoritarians of all flavors are fundamentally cruel douchebags and the current ones are exceptionally stupid to boot (and revel in their anti-intellectualism). Continued resistance and standing up for people and showing them kindness really gets under their skin and I'm a big fan of that.

Politics is dumb and people are terrible. I want to leave the planet.

Yup. Me too buddy. Me too.

I might suggest, if you're able, looking about for local (non-political) nonprofit orgs to see if there are any that really align with what you think is important. Helping others in a tangible manner can really help to stave off apathy.