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Selfhosted
A place to share alternatives to popular online services that can be self-hosted without giving up privacy or locking you into a service you don't control.
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I write software for a living, and have worked with all 3 database options in the past. I don't know what DB backend my nextcloud server is using, nor do I care.
Yeah, that is the kind of concern for the service developer or a very opinionated sys admin. For self-hosting, few people will reach the workload where such a decision has any material or measurable impact.
Self hosting doesn't mean "being wasteful and letting containers duplicate services". I want to know which DB application X is using, so I pool it for applications Y and Z.
For most applications the overhead of running a second DB server is negligible.
And if it's SQLite (which I believe is the default) it's really just reading and writing a file on the file system.