13
Christians Explain Why Jesus Was Too Liberal
(www.theonion.com)
A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.
Great Satire Writing:
Liberal?
The mans straight up socialist
He was a divine right monarchist. He didn't once talk about seizing the means of production, and I don't think his healthcare plan of "laying hands on everyone" is scalable to today's population!
Being anti-authority simply doesn't mean the same thing when the authorities are the Romans.
When James spoke of helping the poor, he said, "is is not enough to say 'be warm and well fed', you must actually give him food and clothing". He might also have said, "it is not enough to say, 'be healed!', you must also pay his medical bill".
I have a rebuttal but simply no time to type it up unfortunately. The core idea is that translating the teachings of a middle eastern rabbi almost 1900 years into the future and comparing them to a western European economist is going to be difficult so don't read too much into it.
The teachings of Jesus weren't macropolitical and any government form claiming to be "the way Jesus would have wanted a country run" is wrong.
Also, the "divine monarchist" point is a weird one. When asked about it, Jesus asserted that his kingdom is "not of this world". And when the Israelite demanded of them relief from the anarchy of the period of the Judges in the form of "a king like the nations have", the response was "don't you already have an even better one?" Which is what John Locke cited when writing against monarchy as practiced at the time.
So, a divine monarch.
Him. The King of the Jews. Their God.
Your cope is weird, purposefully myopic, and misses the obvious joking tone of the comment.