This isn’t a standard for moderation, nor was it moderated out of line. It’s a human interaction, and each of them are unique situations, dealt with by mods who aren’t a hive mind.

The point is that it should be clear when somebody is telling you to disengage and leave them alone. If you think you’ve asked earnestly and didn’t receive a disengagement, you can ask the mods by reporting the questionable content post-disengagement request and giving the additional info.