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this post was submitted on 06 Nov 2025
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Asklemmy
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For me the car meant i felt like a grown up with tons of freedom. I can go anywhere, see anything.
I used to feel like you until i got one. But now, no way im ever living without one again. Its a life upgrade you cant go back from.
And people actually use that as an insult. "You're not an adult until you own a car". Which is a sad way of seeing millions of people that have been living without a car for their whole life.
And the freedom feeling depends mostly if you live in a region that is offering you ways not to be car dependent. Where I live, we have a very decent network of bike paths in the city but also going into the countryside and traversing the province. I live on the island of an archipelago and can pull my inflatable kayak with my bike trailer, explore the islands around, access nature nearby. I can also go camping and hiking and into the wilderness 200 km away by using this cycling network. I often go visit my parents and family 140-170 km away by cycling there. I could have start to drive and bought a car 25 years ago but I moved somewhere I wouldn't need one, and my bike represents freedom. I'm free from having to pay big oil to fill a tank to go anywhere. I'm free from monthly parking fees. I'm free from paying the plates and the insurance.
Over the years, what I learned about cars don't make me see them as freedom. I see them as a way to keep people perpetually paying for gas, sending billions to big oil. I see them as an endless sea and stream of pollution. They pollute the air and the sound. They are bad for mental and physical health. They take an ungodly amount of space. They kill about a million people every year. On the planet, every 30 seconds someone is killed in a car related "accident". Every year, two billion animals (yes, billions) are killed by cars.
Going to see my nephew for his birthday in the suburbs where my sister lives is comical. Twelve people invited to go park their cars around a house that only has space for the cars of the occupants. You have to find parking everywhere you go for this thing, then whine that there's no parking anywhere. Going to a funereal is also depressing, but even more so because you can see the traffic and congestion created by someone that died.
Cars are a horrible for humanity. They're like a drug that everyone tells you to try. You'll see. They're so useful. Of course you can't go back.
I can see your point but almost no people are going to prefer going shopping on a bike (or kayak).
Its nice that you live like that. Sounds very cool, but cars are there for a reason... :) People need to actually get their stuff done quickly and conveniently.
Sure, all the downsides you mentioned are there, but lets not be blind to the enormous upsides that you can literally go anywhere without effort or being exposed to the weather.
Why are you trying to convince me that cars are awesome and for adults that needs to get stuff done?
You think I go shopping using a kayak? There are literally the biggest retail stores of my country a few street corners away from where I live. There is a grocery store on the other side of the street.
And you know, people without cars have nothing to do all day. They don't work and don't do anything important. Only people with cars are busy people getting stuff done. It's impossible to get stuff done otherwise.
Not to mention that peole without cars will never feel like real adults.
I'm not an adult and I don't get stuff done because I don't have a car? I can't go shopping? WTF?
Keep your "freedom". I don't want it. There's already enough cars in the streets. You don't want me driving. Stop trying to convince people that don't want to drive. You have nothing to gain. Everyone already loves cars. I know that.
I'm glad that you love your car. You're not the only one. Now can some people actually want to live without one or are you going to force yours into my living room to tell me how useful it is, and how it makes you feel mature and important?
Lol. :)
Ok mate, have a good day...
So I guess never by a car so you can live without one.
You need a car to feel grown up?
Moving to a car centric city has been significant downgrade for me. I'd much rather walk or cycle than be stuck using a car.
Yeah because it lets me take care of things for the household. Go shop for food, get stuff for renovating house, go to work and home on my own...
I used to just take the bus everywhere but I didnt get anything done. I bought food in the same small overpriced food shop near my apartment, I didnt renovate anything since it was hard to get all the materials home, and I was crowding with others every day at public transport, often waiting for late buses or freezing.
The car has been a massive life upgrade. If you are reading this as someone who lives in an apartment and are happy with that kind of life, thats great. For me it would be a nightmare.
Like an adult?
Look, I get that in your case it's an upgrade. The city you live in sounds like it has piss poor urban design which makes it difficult to think of living without a car.
I used to walk everywhere and take the train and bus and I got things done, was able to explore and find new restaurants and coffee shops etc. But then work forced me to move an urban hellscape where you can't do anything without a car and I fucking hate it. I don't like needing to have an oversized mobility scooter just to get around.
It has tons of buses and trains, but without a vehicle, I cant carry any stuff. I cant shop for a full week with 4 big bags of food and then carry that on the train or the bus.
I cant buy 10 liters of paint and carry it on the bus or train and walk home with it. In theory i could, but its a horrible experience.
I think living without a car works if you are living in a apartment in the city and you shop at the same nearby food shop every day. But you have no options.
Even buying something at Ikea would require a lot of planning. To get there with some bus, to pay for transport home, to be home when they come etc etc.
These are just examples but they add up. Life with a car is freedom.
Okay you're examples are bullshit.
You can't carry stuff? Are you serious? Yes you can carry four bags of food on public transport, it's not difficult.
Are you buying 10 litres of paint every day?
You absolutely do have options, I did not live in an appointment in a city and had a large variety of options.
Again, are you buying things from IKEA every day? Can you not hire a van for one day? It would be cheaper and more practical.
These just sound like excuses. You sound like the type of person to buy a truck just on the possibility that you might need to transport a fridge once in a blue moon.
Life with a car is the opposite of freedom when you are completely dependent on it to do anything.
Its not excuses. I dont have anything to excuse myself for. For driving a car? Thats funny. :)
I just wanted to give you the reasons most people choose to drive a car.
So what are they? How often do you buy 10 litres of paint? How often do you buy furniture? How does not having a car restrict you to one shop?
Most people chose to drive a car because their town/ city has poor urban planning and public transportis an after thought. Go to a city that isn't built for cars and you'll see the opposite is true.