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Why don't more distros use this method?
(www.virtualizationhowto.com)
It's very nice to not have a dozen different versions of the same distro to parse through and figure out that are simply the same distro with a different DE. Moreover, very few of them offer this many options.
Cachy could be doing a better job explaining what the user is looking at here and who each of these is for. Pretty easy to sum up in 1-2 sentences...
Then by all means, give them your 1-2 sentences per DE so that they "only" need to include them!
Frankly, I think it's a lot harder than you're making it out to be, especially over such a large range of DEs. Not that the suggestion is without merit, just that the assumed difficulty of making it work as intended (i.e. actually helping a new Linux user pick the "right" desktop environment for them) seems underestimated.
Maybe Cinnamon can get away with "it's like windows 95", but Gnome and i3 are quite different from anything the target audience has ever experienced.
Gnome: It's like MacOS
Is MacOS also full of shit and they break or remove a random thing that was somehow useful every year?