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submitted 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) by Nebraska_Huskers@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

I got in a political argument with some clown on Facebook. He managed to retrieve my wife's cell phone number and our home phone which is unlisted and technically just provided by our Internet company that we never use.

None our personal info is really available on Facebook and our profiles are pretty locked down, but he called my wife's phone a few times last week which she has blocked and never answers. Comes up as anonymous on her id.

He tried our home phone 16 times which I ignored, everything stopped, he called again tonight. I decided to answer. He said he knows where I live my wife and daughters name, and our address. He never gave out that though and that he is coming to kill us. Said that on the line

I have called my local police department. But this is rural Nebraska they said they can't do anything or have our phone companies run a trace.

Is there anything I can do to figure out who this guy is?

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[-] fizzle@quokk.au 111 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

If he were going to physically harm you or your family in any way, he wouldn't be harassing you on the phone. He's legit just trying to scare you.

The best approach here is to "grey rock" him, which in this case just means not answering. You said you don't use the home phone so just disconnect whatever device. You said your wife has blocked him so that's sorted. Close your fb account or don't log in or whatever.

Call the police and make an actual report to get an actual report number. Here any kind of threat made over a "wire service" is a crime. They may not investigate but that's not the point, in the infinitessimal chance the guy escalates, you want some history.

Refresh home security without going nuts. Maybe a ~~ring~~ door camera, make sure window locks are installed.

Then just go about your life, but maybe avoid throw down arguments on fb.

Edit: don't buy a ring camera.

[-] bdama@lemmy.blahaj.zone 65 points 6 days ago

Please do not buy Ring cameras, Amazons vast surveillance network is a privacy nightmare and is also regularly accessed by ICE and other law enforcement.

Eufy cameras can be used with a home base and stay offline, recording to the SD card in the base. Or if you're into it, there are many self hosting options that give you much more control and options.

[-] ripcord@lemmy.world 2 points 6 days ago

One day i will replace Echos with something better (still waiting for the Home Assistant devices to catch up). Until then, what doorbell camera A) has a battery option (rewiring isn't currently an option) and B) will trigger Echo chimes when rung (really really handy when on the back porch or basement), C) are end-to-end encrypted (Eufys are NOT) without the manufacturer able to access the stream.when they choose

[-] bdama@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 6 days ago

I'm sure you can find this information in selfosted or other more tech oriented communities. Usually the convenience comes at the cost of privacy. It's up to you if you want to keep the microphones in your home to turn off the lights and set timers. I used to trust Apple more and had HomePods installed, but everything has been sold on and I bought egg timers for very cheap that work just as well. (Granted Siri was never very capable..)

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this post was submitted on 19 Jan 2026
234 points (96.8% liked)

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