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[-] Salamanderwizard@lemmy.world 63 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Why wouldn't you lock the door? My partner and I both know when our son is gonna get up. It's like clock work. If we are gonna fool around, we lock the door. We don't want him seeing us.

Still funny shit kids say. Sorry, I got serious there fir a moment lol.

[-] ickplant@lemmy.world 26 points 2 weeks ago

We also always locked the door… but I guess some people don’t in a moment of passion.

[-] avg@lemmy.zip 31 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

They had kids, moments of passion are not allowed unless previously scheduled, approved and notarized.

[-] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 16 points 2 weeks ago

An even then the children will sense the threat of competition parental resources and find a way to stop you.

[-] VicksVaporBBQrub@sh.itjust.works 11 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

"...Mom, they were all in the kitchen like.... and Aunt Kathy was like.... and Auntie Rachel was all.... and then Uncle Darren went all like...."

[-] Gumus@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 2 weeks ago

The girl moves just like Daniel Thrasher!

[-] FooBarrington@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

Hot damn, why is that so accurate?

[-] Salamanderwizard@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago

Fair enough. It's always preplanned for us. I prefer to be clean and ready.

[-] whyNotSquirrel@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 weeks ago

Weird! And what about the safety gloves and hair net??!?

[-] teslekova@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 weeks ago

And the electric fence!

[-] Hawke@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago

Clearly you don’t have cats, who see a closed door as a challenge.

[-] rumba@lemmy.zip 9 points 2 weeks ago

ohh yeah, ohhhhhh

scraaaaaatch scraaaaaatch scraaaaaatch

moww

brrroww

merrrrOWWWOWWOWOOWWWWWWW

[-] ApathyTree@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 2 weeks ago

The challenge doesn’t always stop at the door being open, like my BFF. He genuinely seemed to think he was my mate, but also loved everyone else on earth equally, at a reasonably close second (including cuddles with complete strangers). Whenever my human partner and I would get busy with the door open, he’d try to break us up or get us to focus on him instead. Closed wasn’t much of an option because that meant three other cats screaming to get in, and just the one being jealous was much cuter.

He’d walk and jump across and between us, pace around the bed, nuzzle into my arm for cuddles, curl up between someone’s legs, headbutt my face, bury his face in someone’s hand for pets, love-bite my (and only my) neck and wrists, the whole shebang. Anything he could do to get all the attention on himself and ruin the mood, he did. Except he didn’t meow much, and never that I can remember when he was being a cockblock, so that was nice.

It was fucking adorable, but so so so so so annoying. This started within a year of bringing him home from the shelter (adult, age unknown, likely 5+), and since I had him for 10 years before he passed, across multiple partners, I learned to keep one hand to the side for petting him to keep him reasonably calm. ngl I kinda liked the attention even if it was hugely distracting for everyone. And yes, he did always wiggle his way in the middle of non-sexy cuddles, too. He liked being the cream filling of the Oreo, and insisted upon a cat-body-separation, specifically his for the entire length he could stretch, between me and anyone who stayed in my bed that wasn’t another cat.

[-] Salamanderwizard@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

No, I do. One of them we got from our previous landlord. He was trapped in a room for the first 2 yrs of his life because our landlords dog hated him. So he's very....needy....

[-] Hawke@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

There ya go… that’s why not to lock the door! :-D

[-] Salamanderwizard@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

I would let em in honestly...but my partner...she doesn't like then staring when we are doing the dirty tango. He's the type of cat to want pets during...he's a soft fluffy boy.

[-] Hawke@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

I have a choice between being watched by cats or a destroyed door.

I’ll take the cats.

[-] Salamanderwizard@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

Fair enough. Luckily, our cats more run around knocking stuff down.

this post was submitted on 21 Jan 2026
285 points (97.3% liked)

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