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this post was submitted on 14 Mar 2026
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Asklemmy
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These can returns are self serve, we have them in MA as well. They are completely automated, all you have to do it can in hole, it spins it for you to find the barcode doesn't matter the orientation of the can. You can perch the next can on the lip of the hole and it will suck that one in after it scans the next, and you can get a satisfying little rythem going.
Now the feeling OP is referring to is the same one I feel when I go to the self checkout at Aldi and all the lanes are being used by someone with 4 kids running around, olds who scan one thing, stare at it, look around, then maybe put it down in the bagging area or go back to staring at it, or someone hunting around in a bag/purse looking for payment like they were standing in line earlier and could have been PREPARED FOR THIS LITERAL INEVITABILITY.
It's like people haven't been going to grocery stores for years, and witnessed the whole thing being done tens to hundreds to thousands of times and the entire process is an arcane ritual to them.
I just want a fast lane for people who have qualified in some way that they are there for one purpose, to leave as quickly as possible and have demonstrated at least a passing competence in doing so. I don't care how ridiculous this idea is, I want it.
I rage at my Aldi too, but I don't think I've ever had to wait in line to check out. My issue is that every time I'm there, they're out of a bunch of shit despite ALWAYS moving pallets around and stocking while I'm there. It's also always packed to the gills with clueless people, usually senior citizens, taking up an entire aisle to figure out which cheese they want. And holy shit, everybody walks in the door, stops just inside, and then reaches in their pocket for their grocery list to figure out where to go, holding up everybody just trying to get in and get their shit. Like wtf, you drove here and don't have a clue what you need? Just walk 20 feet in and pull to the side if you're this fucking inept.
If you're interested in some insight:
As a humans eyes get older, the ability for the eyes pupil to dilate and constrict quickly diminishes.
What this means practically is that moving from a sunny area into a lower lighted area makes it difficult to perceive much in front of the human. Perhaps even you! In an attempt to collide with other humans, the human with older eyes will pause to allow their older eyes to adjust to the lower light, thereby proceeding forward safely.
The cool thing is, this will happen to you.
Prepare your karma appropriately.
Good hunting!
What is with people and doors?!
The final thing that almost always occurs as I am leaving is (again usually older, but definitely not exclusively) is that someone will stop dead ass in the middle of the sliding door and start fishing out their keys/sunglasses/whatever leading to me almost running them over.
It's enraging. I am six foot tall, built like a fuckin linebacker, and have been since I was like 15. I have spent my entire adult life being highly aware of the space I occupy so I don't encroach or inhibit others needlessly and yet I could apparently just stop caring (I would have to be dead and buried and perhaps then my brain would stop caring).
There is a weird part of the human brain where there is a slight reset when entering a new room, probably to survey the new place for something that will kill you. It is the reason why people forget what they are doing when they go into another room.
In public, it is really annoying as there are people behind that person during their reset.
I hear you. I like the idea of higlybskilled in 'n out type customers' high speed lane. I'm in many occations that guy.
But.
I don't like thecself checkout over paid personnel at all. I have lately shifted from speedrun to more laidback and thus hsve time to wait in line for human checkout.
Now the more we refused self checkouts, the more they have to hire workers. Thecself checkouts are found only in dominant retail chains.