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But it adds phenomenal depth
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this post was submitted on 26 Apr 2026
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Lord of the memes
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"name five women"
Silmarillion enthusiast: "Melian, Lúthien, Galadriel, Idril, ... uh... Ungoliant?"
"John you want to add some women to this? The entire first book is 9 dudes walking and taking to a bunch of other dudes."
"I'm gonna make a whole race of TREES and they're not even going to know where their women ARE!"
Is Ungoliant the giant spider? I forgot.
That's Shelob. Which counts! We got 5!
Edit: actually nevermind, you were right. Ungoliant is also a giant spider
Specifically, Shelob's mom, IIRC. Which means, unlike Shelob, Ungoliant's sex actually matters to the story.
Shelob is the mother of the mirkwood spiders isn't she? Those spiders were never identified as male or female, so I assume they don't have any lesser children.
Points to random passing woman: -- I dub thee Meredith!
Varda, Queen of the Valar, AKA Tintallë, Elbereth Gilthoniel, among other names.
The goddess Sam prayed to when he sang the hymn A Elbereth Gilthoniel to give him the courage to face Shelob.
I mean yeah, I could have come up with any of the seven Valier, or Uinen, Eärwen, Elwing, Niënor, Míriel, Aredhel, Silmariën, etc. etc., but that wouldn't have made the joke very funny