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[-] arctanthrope@lemmy.world 44 points 1 month ago

"name five women"

Silmarillion enthusiast: "Melian, Lúthien, Galadriel, Idril, ... uh... Ungoliant?"

[-] SippyCup@lemmy.world 15 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

"John you want to add some women to this? The entire first book is 9 dudes walking and taking to a bunch of other dudes."

"I'm gonna make a whole race of TREES and they're not even going to know where their women ARE!"

[-] grue@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

“I’m gonna make a whole race of TREES and they’re not even going to know where their women ARE!”

[-] lath@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

Is Ungoliant the giant spider? I forgot.

[-] SippyCup@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

That's Shelob. Which counts! We got 5!

Edit: actually nevermind, you were right. Ungoliant is also a giant spider

[-] grue@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Specifically, Shelob's mom, IIRC. Which means, unlike Shelob, Ungoliant's sex actually matters to the story.

[-] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Shelob is the mother of the mirkwood spiders isn't she? Those spiders were never identified as male or female, so I assume they don't have any lesser children.

[-] Notyou@sopuli.xyz 4 points 1 month ago
[-] acockworkorange@mander.xyz 4 points 1 month ago

Points to random passing woman: -- I dub thee Meredith!

[-] chonglibloodsport@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago

Varda, Queen of the Valar, AKA Tintallë, Elbereth Gilthoniel, among other names.

The goddess Sam prayed to when he sang the hymn A Elbereth Gilthoniel to give him the courage to face Shelob.

[-] arctanthrope@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago

I mean yeah, I could have come up with any of the seven Valier, or Uinen, Eärwen, Elwing, Niënor, Míriel, Aredhel, Silmariën, etc. etc., but that wouldn't have made the joke very funny

[-] Cypher@aussie.zone 23 points 1 month ago

Hide and seek world record?

[-] maniacalmanicmania@aussie.zone 6 points 1 month ago

Fuck the elves. Murderous bastards.

[-] acockworkorange@mander.xyz 6 points 1 month ago

Fuck the elves. Hot horny bastards.

[-] UltraMagnus0001@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Man, remember the characters name in the silmarillion was hard,

[-] GhostedIC@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 month ago

This is how Dragonball starts

[-] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

Dafuq you talkin about? I even spoke to one once!

[-] boonhet@sopuli.xyz 4 points 1 month ago
[-] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago
[-] Scubus@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 month ago
[-] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

Stay away, homewrecker!

[-] FilthyShrooms@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago
[-] zitrone@europe.pub 1 points 1 month ago

*Dafuq you tolkien about?

[-] Etterra@discuss.online 4 points 1 month ago

"that guy make me feel funny inside."

[-] Agent641@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

"Something wrong with that fellas chest!"

[-] Magnum@infosec.pub 3 points 1 month ago
this post was submitted on 26 Apr 2026
288 points (95.3% liked)

Lord of the memes

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