Ah, yes. The Canadian Independence Penis Envy. They have been and will be second to the US, and that pisses them off. Why won't they just listen, stop defending their economy, and just be the 51st state already? There are so many benefits, I can't start to count.

Ah, yes. The English Language Penis Envy. They have been for a while and will be second to Chinese. Why won't they just accept that it would be far more economically efficient to speak the same language as our main producer? They just have to put their pesky superiority feelings aside and accept that every children in the US and Canada should now learn Chinese as their first language.

Ah yes. The Ukrainian Independence Penis Envy. They have been and will be second to Russia, and that pisses them off. Why won't they simply accept that they're not even a real country, bow down and finally accept Putin's rule?

Ah yes. The Taiwan Independence Penis Envy. The have been and will be second to China, and that pisses them off. Why won't they simply accept that they're not the real China and just come back inside the mainland? So many economic benefits.

Ah yes. The Indigenous Culture Penis Envy. They have been and will be second to European rule, and that pisses them off. Why won't they understand that there place is in the residential schools? Why won't they understand that to be properly civilized is for their benefit and that we know better than them?

Ah yes. The European Tech Sovereignty Penis Envy. The have been and will be second to American tech companies. Why won't they understand that they're too late, that it'll be too costly and that it's really just an unfair attack against American companies to declare that they have too much power over their infrastructure?

I could go on.

The defense of French language is not about saying that we are better than everyone else (although some disgusting people do think that). It is about fighting to stay alive in a world where any slippage means death. It's about fighting the 80%-90% of english-first speakers in North America that put enormous amounts of funds and weight behind assimilation. When the might of the United States and the government of your own country is pushing for you to speak english, the only way to survive is by lashing out some times.