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I got it working but curiously enough the server needed to add the clients as introducers. Then it worked and I got a message on all devices that a new folder has been added and showing a UI that easily allowed me to add the folder.
So I setup every "client" to have the "server" as the introducer and auto-accept shares. Then on the "server", I add the new client, and give it all the shares. The new device auto accepts, and all the other clients automatically include the new client.