It's faux pas to even defend yourself, or question the framing of a dialogue or call out legitimate direct discrimination. If you think labeling an entire group as the evil enemy is going to make the bad actors or moderates in the group more likely to align with you, you are an idiot. On Reddit I moved to the leftist subreddit /r/onguardforthee when /r/Canada became too right wing and I'd started to see directly bigoted comments more often.

I got banned from the new subreddit for saying "hey maybe calm down with the direct racism and sexism here. We should be better than those we criticize."

If you're defending "the bad ones" you're the enemy.

I've been thoroughly egalitarian and anti-bigotry my entire life. I've also been beaten until my eyes were swollen shut in school by people I didn't know, and punished for "instigating with racist language" that I would never use because the older two kids knew it would get them out of trouble. I was just waiting to get into the library to read a book.

I've been accused countless times of racism working in retail because of things I had no control over. (Shout out to my old manager Om for calling out their bullshit)

I've been told in no uncertain terms by another manager that I would not have been hired if they were there at the start because they "do not hire men."

I've been told countless times I should not even be allowed to speak or have an opinion due to the body I was born into. That any action I take is directly unfair or harmful regardless of my intent or reasoning. I don't define myself or others by their bodies. Nobody chose their body.

Etc.

Would you think defending this sort of behavior really helps to reduce bigotry?

It's really just making me hate all of humanity. Everyone is terrible and being reasonable is an unforgivable sin on every side.

No nuance is allowed. If you don't agree with incredibly broad generalizations, you are evil. American history and culture is globally applicable and enforced.

I just want people to stop judging and mistreating others for things they have no control over. I guess I deserve to be hated or mistreated for that alone.